Finding the Kingdom
by lady.dreamer2002
Summary: A girl who has lost all hope finds herself in a new world, and there learns more about herself, and what darkness grows inside her heart. This story is a reflection of the Kingdom Hearts story.
1. Chapter 1

I ran through the white halways. I knew them like the back of my hand. The alarms didn't sound yet. Nobody knew that I had escaped, not even my roomate who was still asleep. It was a good start. I found the medic lab. I pulled the card key out and unlocked my room. What great luck I had, pickpotenig it from a doctor. Inside I opened the drawers until I found a syringe. Then I went to the medication cabinets. I examined the labels through the glass. I didn't know what they all meant, but I figured one of them were lethal in a large enough dose. I took a big one, and filled the entire syringe with the liquid. The thought crossed my mind then. Why not use it now? No one would stop me. But then again, they might save me at the last moment, like last time. No, escaping was my only chance of freedom now.

I ran as fast and silently as I could toward the entrance, and then halted at a corner. I took a peep. I was about to enter the dividing room between the patient hospital and the visitor center. A security guard was sitting at the desk watching a show, and his partner nowhere that I could see. I was lucky that he hadn't been watching the security cameras, they didn't usually because nothing ever happened. But I still didn't have much time; I had to be quick before the other guard came back. I clung to the wall, and went swiftly to the back of the guard. He suspected nothing. With the syringe in one hand and the other swiftly taking the man's neck, I struck the needle into his chest. He shouted out but I had my hand over his mouth before he made too much noise.

"I don't know what is inside this, would you like to find out?" I whispered into his ear. "Take me outside and you won't have to."

He stood up and took the keys. I walked with him to the door, my hand pressed against the syringe. It was strange, I had never done this before, but I made every step flawless, like I was training for this. We walked to the door; he used a card to open the first door. We walked into the visitor room.

"Go, hurry."

We walked past the tables with the chairs propped up on them. There was no light, but it wasn't so hard for me to see, I was already accustamed to the dark. I could see better than the guard though, he stumbled into a table and I had to steer him in the right direction. We walked into the lobby. And finally, there was the door to the outside. I didn't know what I would do once out there, but I figured my instincts would lead me the right way. The way to freedom.

"Open it." I commanded.

The guard riffled through his set of keys. With trembling hands he put one in, but it didn't turn. I pushed him against the door.

"Don't do this, you know the right key so open that door now."

Then I heard a sound that made the hair stand up on my neck. The sound of men shouting in the distance; they knew I escaped.

The man took a key and tried again but it didn't work. I lost my patience. I emptied the syringe into his chest and pushed him aside, taking his keys before he fell. I went through them and tried one, and tried another. A few more and I would have found the right one. But it was already too late. A group of men busted through the door. Four of them grabbed me and took me down on the floor. I yelled, kicked, punched, scratched, bit, and did everything I could to fight them off. I succeeded by biting on one's hand. But they were too strong and had grabbed my limbs and held them down. A nurse came over me and stuck a syringe in my arm, and everything faded away.

"That was quite a show, don't you think? You really are very persistent. How you got my key, I will never know. Tell me one thing though. Why do you want to escape from here?"

I said nothing, staring at the floor. If I tried to be smart with him, he would probably lock me up in solitude again. After giving me a chance to answer, he turned around and went to his desk.

"Let's review your file, shall we? Hana Newman. Charged on the act of voluntary manslaughter. Violent nature. Suicidal tendencies. And finally, suffering from MPD. Now I ask you again, why do you want to escape? Do you actually think you are fit to live amongst society in the state that you're in?"

I looked up at him. "I don't know."

"You are a danger to everyone around you, including yourself. This is the third time you have escaped your room now. You have been admitted into solitude countless times. Tell me haven't you had enough of this?"

I said nothing.

"I know things are bad as they are, but I can help you. I can make you better so that you can re-enter society and have a life. Don't you want that?"

Like that would ever happen. He was teasing me. "I would like that."

The doctor let out a sigh. "Are you ready to return to your room?"

"Yes, doctor."

He nodded to the men behind me. They let me out of my straight jacket. The men secured me by the shoulders and walked me away.

"And you better start taking your pills, I know you have been tricking the nurses." The doctor said after me.

"I don't believe it. That was shorter than last time. I was sure he might keep you in there for a year, but only a month?" My roomate Karmen said as the men closed the door behind me.

"I'm lucky I guess." I said as I walked to my bed to sit. Karmen was sitting on hers playing cards.

Karmen was older than me, about twenty I think. She had brown hair she kept in a braid, brown eyes, and a pale, skinny figure like me. She was here for car and store thefts, disturbing the peace, and burning her boyfriend alive. She told the court that the voices in her head told her to do it, and that's how she ended up here with me. The mental hospital isn't as brutal as jail, I supposed. Our beds were side by side, with some bedside tables and a barred window. My bed looked exactly how I left it, with my black guitar leaning against it.

"I can't believe you tried to escape without telling me. They had locked the door back before I even knew what happened."

"You might have made too much noise. You talk too much."

"Well I would have managed to stay quiet for that. But its true, you are quiet as a mouse. I never even stirred that night." She went back to her game, and I took my guitar and touched the strings. I refrained from playing it too much; I didn't want to break a string. There was no way I could replace them.

"So what now?" She asked.

"What do you mean?"

She lowered her voice. "You've escaped three times now. But every time you get caught. So what are you going to do now? Obviously you have got to change something or you will always get caught."

"Hmm. I don't know."

"You do too, you just don't want to tell me."

We stayed in silence for a while. Karmen, as always, broke the silence.

"Listen, I know you don't consider me your friend, and I respect that. But I can help you. Just like you can help me. Let's escape together."

I felt her staring at me while I looked into my guitar. I saw a sort of reflexion of myself, but it wasn't much of anything. I thought about what the doctor asked, why I wanted to escape. I thought about my response, and it was true, I didn't know why I wanted to escape. There was no one waiting for me, I wouldn't be different, it wouldn't make me better. I had no plan. I guess it was only freedom I wanted.

I looked up to Karmen. "What do you have in mind?" A big grin came across her face.

"Why do you get food if you won't eat it?" Karmen asked me.

We were in the cafeteria. I looked down at my plate and shrugged my shoulders. It was because I couldn't let them think I wasn't eating, or they would do more tests on me. Because the fact was I never ate, or drank, or slept in the ten months I had been here. Even sometimes when I lie in bed, and lose myself in thought, I would find myself not breathing, and I wouldn't know for how long I was not breathing. Though I figure it could have been for hours. It scared me. I shouldn't even be alive. But something kept me going.

"Your medicine." A nurse gave me a little cup with pills. I took it and put them in my mouth. Karmen took hers too. The nurse didn't leave though; she gave a slight cough for my attention. I opened my mouth and showed her my tongue, and she passed on. Once she was out of sight, we both spit our pills out.

"How did you hide those?"

"Caught them in my throat."

"That's not even possible. But I shouldn't complain. You're such a trouble maker they forget to check me."

The next hour was our break. It was the best time of the day, because we could go outside. We stayed in a tiny, fenced-in park, with a little pond to the side surrounded by a garden. Karmen and I always sat at a bench next to the pond.

"I have a friend out there, a good friend. He came to visit me today."

"So."

"So, he gave me a present. A box of candies, and also a screwdriver."

"How did he hide it?"

"He made a secret compartment for it. Managed to fool security. So now we can take those bars out. That's how we'll do it."

I nodded.

About ten days later, late in the night when everyone was sleeping, we got out of our beds and put on our shoes. We took our sheets and knotted them together. I opened the window, and took hold of the bars. I wiggled them, and Karmen had to use the screwdriver a bit but we got them off, leaving one on the far side. Karmen tied the sheet to it.

"Alright, you first." I said. Karmen climbed out the window and down the building. Luck was with us again, everything held tight. I turned to my guitar, the only thing I had left in the world. I touched it. "Goodbye." I whispered, and climbed out the window.

There was a long drop, but we both managed. I wondered why escaping wasn't always this easy. But we weren't out yet; we had to get past the fence. I took the lead, and we went to the parking lot to steal a car.

"We have to find one with the keys inside." I whispered.

"Or I can just jump it." Karmen crept up to an old truck. It was unlocked. She started to work while I kept a look out for guards. Then the alarm went off. They must have seen us on security.

"Hurry!" She started the car.

I ran to the other side.

By the time we were inside the guards had caught up to us, but this time they were too late. Karmen pressed on the gas, and we bolted through the lot and down the road. The gate was closed, but that was no problem for the truck. Karmen bolted right through and turned down a main road.

"Woooo! Finally, we did it!" She yelled.

"We aren't safe yet, they are going to send the police after us."

"Heh, they won't find us."

We sped down the road. We were in the middle of the forest, I hadn't seen the it in a long time. I went through the dashboard and found a pocketknife.

"Look what I found."

"Sweet."

We sped down roads and around curves, and I was uneasy with how fast we were going.

"Slow down."

"You want to get caught?"

She had a reason, but I still kept an eye on the road and put my seat belt on in case. We drove down a long, narrow road, that had a few light posts down the way. Ahead of us, a man stepped out into the road. He wore a black hood that covered his face. But he didn't cross; he stood in the middle of our lane, looking at us.

"What's this nut doing?"

"Slow down. And get out of the way."

"He will move eventually."

"Karmen, you can't. You're going to run him over."

She wouldn't slow down, and the man didn't move. Another few seconds and we would have ran him over. So I took the wheel and tried to turn into the other lane, but she fought back.

"Cut it out." She turned back and I jerked it to the other side. We ran of the road. We took out a few of the little trees and then WHAM.

I woke up with a great pain in my head and ribs. I looked down at my hands and patted my legs; nothing seemed broken except maybe a rib. I also still had the knife in my hand. There was blood on my shirt, so I must've hit my head too. I looked up; we crashed into a tree. Looking over, I saw Karmen. The tree crashed into us on her side, and it looked like the wheel was crushing her leg. There was blood all over her face and body. I knew she was probably dead. I took my belt off and pushed the door open. It took some force but I finally got it open. I fell to the ground; the pain in my ribs was too much. I heard police sirens in the far distance. I wished that crash had taken my life, and not hers. I knew I had to get away, find my freedom from them. But what for? I still didn't know. The hundreds of days I spent thinking and I still didn't know.

I had gotten to my feet, and started walking into the forest.

"Hana."

The voice shocked me because it was from Karmen. I looked back and saw her looking at me. She extended a hand.

"Help."

I looked behind us; the police were close. How was I going to take her with me? I didn't even know if I could get her out. I decided I had to leave her. I looked at her one last time, and turned to run.

I knew it was next to impossible to escape now. I was bleeding and my blood would leave a trail for the dogs. I still couldn't give up. I still had the knife so I wouldn't go without a fight. I was trying to run when something caught the corner of my eye. I saw a figure running in the forest. It was the hooded man from the road. He was following me, but why? He struck fear into my heart, and I picked up my pace, even though the pain in my side was growing unbearable.

I went like that for five, maybe ten minutes. I knew the man was quicker, so I wondered why he hadn't caught me yet. What was he waiting for? Not to mention with every minute I was going slower and slower. And then all of a sudden I found a clearing in the forest with a wooden door in the middle. I stopped and stared for a second. It was just a door without a wall or house, standing all alone. I walked up to it, and felt it. I wasn't hallucinating; it really was there. I looked behind it but there was nothing. Only a door. Then I heard steps behind me. I looked and there was the hooded man. I lifted up my knife.

"What do you want with me?"

He kept coming closer.

"I won't think twice about taking your life. I've done it before."

He was almost to me. Then swiftly, he stepped up and took my hand with the knife before I even knew it. He was too strong for me.

"Be warned, monster of the darkness." He was so close now I saw part of his face. His skin seemed gray, but I didn't think it was possible. He looked into my eyes, but I couldn't see his. "I will hunt you down. You will atone for your sins." And he dug the knife into me. It was excruciating pain. He let go, and I slid down with the knife still in my side. "Now go." He started to blur. I felt death come upon me, and I welcomed it as my friend. I was scared, and I was relieved. It's hard to describe my feelings. It was as if I was sorry for dying, but I knew it was my attonement. I laid there to wait for death. Little by little everything grew dark, and then nothing.

I felt a bright light above me through my closed eyes. I thought to myself that I must've died. I wanted to open my eyes to see where I was, but they were heavy. I heard the sound of crashing waves in front of me. One of my hands was on the ground. It was sand I felt. I made myself open my eyes. Blue seeped into my vision, and I saw the sky over my head. I lifted my head a bit, and saw the knife in my ribs, and behind that I saw the ocean, and a few birds in the distance. With difficulty I took the knife out and rested it on the ground. I started to think maybe I wasn't dead yet.

Then I heard the faint sound of people. I could hear running. I heard someone yell out something. I didn't want to be taken; this was my chance.

"Hey are you okay?" It was a boy's voice, but my vision was blurry and against the sun I could only see a dark, blurry head.

I tried to tell them to go away, but I murmurred something else.

"We have to get her to the doctor."

I started breathing harder.

"We are going to get you help." It was a girl this time, and there was another boy there too.

"Please, leave me…"

They stopped for a moment. I hoped they would leave me in peace.

"We should take her now. Go get a boat, Kairi."

They lifted me up. It was painful and I slowly slipped into unconciousness again.


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up in a room laying on a bed. I looked to the side and through a window I saw the white wall of a house. Looking around, I saw that I was in a normal bedroom, but none that I had ever seen before. There was a bedside table that had a glass of water and my knife on it. I tried to get up, but there was a pain from my wounds and I stopped. Then I heard someone walking towards the door, and quickly fell back and pretended to sleep. The door opened and a few people walked in.

"Is she going to be okay?" It was a voice I had heard on the beach.

"Yes, she seems to be doing fine. It is a wonder that she is with us at all. She looks as if she hasn't eaten in months, and she lost a great deal of blood. But she's in good care."

"Is there anything we can do for her?"

"The best thing to do now is to let her sleep. Now it's best you three run along."

The door closed, I waited a few moments to make sure no one was in the room. I slowly raised myself to sit on the bed. It hurt, but this time I was prepared. I thought for a second that I was back in the institute again, but it was nothing like it. Maybe they took me to some different one, I didn't know but I didn't want to be caught again. I got up and took the knife, and escaped throught the window.

Not a moment later the doctor came back to the room to find an empty bed and an open window. He stood there, stupefied. Then ran out to the front and called after the children.

"Riku! Sora, Kairi! She's gone!"

"What?"

"The girl you brought me is gone. Through the window, I think."

"But we just saw her sleeping." Sora said.

"Would you like to see for yourself? But you will waste time. She is in critical condition, she can't be running around."

"He's right." Riku said. "Let's hurry."

It turned out I was in a town near the beach; I could see it and an island nearby. I thought to myself it was best if I disappeared from society. I could find a big city to shrink into, where no one would notice me. I made sure to stay out of sight of people. I dashed through alleys, and quickly crossed roads, making sure to follow the main road through town. Eventually I came to the beach. Nobody was there. I started to walk along the beach but before I could I heard someone behind me.

"Stop there." I said as I turned around, pointing my knife at the boy behind me. He was a few yards from me. He had spiky brown hair, bright blue eyes, and wore baggy clothes.

"Woah. Calm down. I'm not going to hurt you."

"Who are you?"

"My name is Sora. Who are you?"

"Where are we?"

He looked a bit hurt because I didn't answer his question.

"Destiny Islands."

"This is an island too?"

"Yeah. Look, I want to help you."

"I need to go to the city."

"A city?"

"Yes; whatever one closest to here. Where is a boat I can take to get there?"

"There isn't one."

"There's no boat?"

"No city, this is all there is."

By now two others came running up to us: one a taller boy with silver hair and aqua green eyes and the other a girl with short, bright red hair and blue eyes.

"Hey!" The silver haired boy yelled. "What do you think you're doing?"

I ignored him and kept my gaze fixed on Sora. "What do you mean, this is all there is? There has to be other cities or countries."

They were silent for a moment. They didn't know how to tell me the truth.

"I know how you feel." The girl broke the silence. "You're confused. You need to trust me, everything is alright."

"Do you remember where you came from?" The silver haired boy asked.

"Riku! Ask her that later. We'll shock her."

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"Okay, listen." Sora said. "This will be hard for you to understand, but you come from another world. This world is not the one you know. And in this world, there are only a few islands we live on. This is it."

I thought for a moment, bewildered. I looked behind me to confirm the other island. Then dropped my hand down to my side.

"You're saying we're on another world?"

"Yes."

"How do you know?"

"Kairi came here from another world too, same as you did. She doesn't remember it, but we never saw her before. There isn't any other way."

"Huh." If this was true, then they weren't a threat to me. They didn't know who I was. I turned around and sat down, I was in pain again. Sora walked over to me.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah. Yeah, just kind of taking it all in."

"You need to go back to the doctor." Riku said.

"I'm fine."

"Then answer my question, from before. Where did you come from?"

"You know, I don't remember."

"Are you sure?"

I nodded.

"What's your name?"

"Hana."

He didn't ask anything else. One by one they came and sat next to each other, keeping their distance from me.

"Aren't you in pain?" Riku asked after a few moments.

"I'm alright."

"She needs a place to stay," Kairi said, "and some clothes."

I just realised I was wearing only a large shirt and shorts.

"Do you want to go to the store, we can pay for your clothes."

I sat in silence for a moment. "Sure."

"Without the knife?" Riku asked.

I looked at it, and then gave it to him. "No problem."

Sora helped me up, and I followed them to the store.

It was the first time I had seen myself in a mirror in about ten months. They never allowed mirrors there; they thought it would set someone off. When I saw myself, I couldn't believe it was me. I was so thin and pale. I literally had no stomach. My cheekbones projected out from my face. My eyes were the worst. The skin under my eyes was dark shadows, and my eyes had no spark or life in them. Just dull green pools. I hadn't done anything to my hair except to brush out the tangles. The once golden curls were now dusty blonde, with no shine and no form, like a mop sprouting from my head. I was gauntly and sickly looking, and it scared me. Not to mention what the others must have thought. They found me a pair of green pants with extra pockets, and a pair of sneakers, and a white tank with a blue hoodie.

"You look better." Sora said.

"Didn't your mother teach you not to lie?" I passed without looking at him.

"Anyway," Kairi started once we were outside, "we were talking, and we think it would be best of you to go back to the doctor. You were badly hurt, and it will help you heal quicker. After you get better, you can stay with Sora's family. They have an extra bedroom."

If I was stuck here, then I didn't have much say in the matter. I had to get along with them. Besides, they were being very generous. It had been along time since someone was generous with me.

"Okay, I'll go."

They took me back to the doctor. And I stayed there. I hoped maybe I would sleep, but I couldn't. I just lost myself in thought, like I did every night.

The next day they came back and asked how I was, but I ignored them as best as I could, as I did for the next three days. Honestly I could have gone out after the second, but I was afraid of them finding out what I was. My other doctor was right, my freedom didn't make me any more sane. On the fourth day I was tired of being in bed, and I went out. In the living room of the house I found a calender. It was June 28th, a day from my one year anniversary. It was a day I wish had never happened. I didn't realise before that it was so near, and it gave me a feeling I hadn't felt in a long time. It was sadness. I was sad and it was strange to be sad because I hardly ever felt any emotion. Except of course for the shock the other day, but it wasn't so bad. The sun had not come up yet, and so I went to the beach and waited for the sunrise. As I sat I dwelled in my past sins, to depress myself further. I had even come to like this new emotion, and I welcomed it and made it to grow more and more. I thought that maybe I would cry. I felt like it, even wanted to, but I used up my tears long ago. Then by daylight, people started walking past me, fishermen I assumed. I heard whispers of 'is that the girl?' and other gossip behind me, but I never looked at them.

"So you've come out today?" It was Kairi. I looked and the three of them were behind me.

"Do you guys always stick together like that?"

"Yeah, we're friends."

I didn't respond, but continued watching the ocean.

"You want to come with us today?" Sora asked.

"No."

"So what, you're just going to sit here all day? Alone?" Riku asked.

"Maybe."

"Come on, you can't stay here by yourself the whole time. You can come with us and sit there."

"I'm was better off alone."

"Please." Kairi pleaded.

But there was something about them that reminded me of my friends.

"Alright, fine." I got up. They smiled.

We walked down the beach.

"Do you want to eat something first? You look like your starving." Asked Riku.

"No."

"Do you eat?"

"Not much."

"Why?"

"I'm never hungry."

We walked to a dock. "Are we going somewhere?"

"To the other island, we always stay there during the day."

I got into Riku's boat, and we rowed there.

"That was where we found you." Sora said as he pointed at the beach.

"I assumed I was on the other one."

"Nope. This is also where me and Riku found Kairi."

"Hmm. So what do you do here?"

"We practice sword fighting," said Sora, "and swim and…"

"Sleep." Interrupted Kairi.

"Not all the time!" Sora exclaimed.

"No, that would only be you." Riku joked.

"Hmph, whatever." They were quiet for awhile.

"But today we won't do any of that." Said Riku.

"Why not?"

"We are building a raft." Said Kairi.

"What for?"

"To go to another world."

"Are you serious? A raft? Don't you need a space ship or something?"

They looked offended.

"We will get there," said Riku, "no matter what, even if the raft doesn't work. We'll think of something else if we have to. But for all we know, you were dragged here from another world by the ocean, so the answer is somewhere out there."

"Sure." I knew they were beginning to not like me, with good reason. I wasn't a likeable person. That at least didn't change.

I sat against a palm tree watching them work. They were building up the mast. They were right; Sora did sleep while they worked. But then again, Kairi just told them what to do, she didn't do much of the work either. It was Riku who did most of it. He was determined. Some other kids came and made fun of them but the three didn't listen to them. Right before the sun went down, they finished the mast.

"Good job guys!" Kairi exclaimed, once everything was finished. "Tomorrow we'll collect supplies, and then the next day we'll start our journey!"

"I can't wait." Sora said, and Riku nodded.

"What a shame, I won't be seeing you guys around."

"We will be back soon," Sora said, "don't worry."

"We're going to go up there to watch the sunset, you want to come?"

"No, I'll just wait by the docks."

They went and I walked down the beach. I noticed the waterfall, and went to go look. I stepped into the pool. The water was crystal clear. I cupped my hands under the fall, and brought it to my lips. It was cool and crisp. But the moment it touched my toungue, a rush of pain and bitterness and rage went through my head, and darkness passed over my eyes. I spit it out, then stood panting. I emberassed myself, but for that moment I wanted to believe I could drink it.

_Foolish girl._

I didn't know what I expected really. I knew in my heart I would never be myself again. My heart was too broken to be put back together.

_A shadow._

I was only a shadow of the girl that I was, she had died along time ago. She died a year ago from tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3

I went with them again the next day, but I wasn't really myself. I was so sad from the memories of my past. Kairi was lucky that she could forget her memories, I wish'd I could forget mine. But it wasn't only my memories that made me how I was. Whatever kept me in the state that I was; I was sick, but I didn't know what with.

"Are you okay? You're more distant then you were yesterday." Riku asked.

"I'm fine." I murmured.

I didn't stay near them today. I went across the bridge and laid down on the leaning palm tree. I watched the clouds move across the sky. I thought about the good times I had, my happiest memories. And they made me bitter. And the worst thought I had, was that I still felt the urge to escape, but from what?

_This world has been connected._

They talked about other worlds. Maybe if I could go to one, I could leave them and finally be alone. Left to rot without anyone taking care of me or bothering me.

_Stay here._

But for the moment I was content watching the sky. I watched as it turned blue to pink to orange. The day seemes to pass like minutes.

"Come on, we're going."

I didn't respond, thinking he might go away if I ignored him.

"What's your problem?"

"I am sure I don't know what you're talking about."

"You don't like to talk with us. You make fun of our dreams."

"Sorry I'm not a social butterfly. And I didn't mean anything with your raft."

"We've done so much for you and you never even thanked us." I was still quiet. "Well, I'm going, are you coming?"

"I'll go with Sora today."

Riku left, soon after Sora and Kairi walked past. They didn't notice me; they probably thought I had gone with Riku. I saw them talking at the dock, and then they left.

So I was there, alone on the island. Alone. Solitude was my only friend now; I spent most of my time with it. But I never enjoyed its company. I felt despair when I was alone: a longing, cruel despair.

_Not long now._

I wouldn't be alone for long. Wait…

I kept my mind silent for a few minutes. I thought I was hearing something. I sat up and looked to see if someone was there. There was no one.

The wind started to blow harder, and a storm was coming. And then I realized what was happening. Something was forming in the sky: a big, black ball. It grew and grew, red thunder inside. It was the storm. I got up and looked around, the tide was stronger than before. I wondered if the raft would hold.

_The door has opened._

What did I know about a door? Was someone talking with me? I looked around again but there wasn't anyone in sight.

Then I saw little black monsters with beady yellow eyes springing from out of the ground.

"What?"

They didn't attack me; they only stared at me, waiting. And then everything started to turn black, blacker than the night. Something was forming around me. A capsul maybe. Within seconds, I was covered in darkness.

_This is it._

I was afraid of what would happen next. I was being taken somewhere. I felt myself moving. It was disorientating, and I couldn't see or think or act in any way. Then I saw something in the distance, a little bit of light with a black hand coming out from it. It reached out to me and I reached to it.

_No!_

I checked myself. I didn't like the fact of being dragged into an uknown place by that hand. I instead waited to see what would happen to me in the darkness. Then I heard in the distance someone's voice. 'Sora.' It was Riku's voice. I looked around but I didn't see him. 'Kairi's coming…' 'We can't let fear stop us.'

We can't let fear stop us. I repeated it again in my head. The hand was there, to save me from the darkness, I supposed. I decided it was worth a shot. I reached out and caught it, and was pulled through.

I woke up sitting in the corner of a restaurant, with tables and chairs around me. I looked down at my hands. In them was the black glove of the hand that saved me. I felt more dread in my heart than I did before. Why did I want to be saved? I didn't deserve it. I would've died there. I would've accepted death as a long lost friend, so why was I afraid of it?

I lifted myself up and leaned against the wall to look around. I wasn't on the island anymore. Everything was made out of stone. I stepped out of the restaurant and saw a plaza with two lamplights. It was only a village with shops and other surrounding buildings. I put the glove in one of my pockets. There were some people in the plaza, along with some kind of animal. I say animal, but it walked on two legs and was talking to someone. It also had a red ball that came out of its head. I ignored them and went to the shop to my side.

"Oh boy! A customer!"

I walked into a shop with three ducks. Three ducks. I knew I heard someone talk, but surely it wasn't…

"Can we help you?"

"Huh, talking animals? Umm, where are we."

"You're new here! I thought I hadn't seen your face before."

"This is Traverse Town." Another said.

"Okay."

"Would you like to buy—something?" I had already walked out before he finished. Talking animals was a bit much for me.

Back outside, I stood there for a while. I really didn't know what to do next. I decided to go look around the town. I went up the stairs, there was another shop. I hoped this one had people inside.

"Hey there, how…? Oh, another kid."

"Umm, yeah."

"A new comer to, eh?"

"Yeah. Look, umm…"

"What's the matter with ya? Well I guess you're confused?"

I didn't want to admit it.

"Hey, wait a minute. That other kid who was here, he was looking for his friends, are you one of them? Oh, what were their names?"

"I doubt it, I don't really have anyone who know me."

"Well, anyway. I guess you need a place to stay then?"

Then we heard noise outside.

"Hmm? What's going on out there?"

I heard swords clang and grunts. I stepped out and saw two people fighting in the plaza. One of them was Sora. They had each other pinned, they were both starting to get tired. And then Sora fainted. That wasn't good. A girl passed by me in the direction of them, and I followed.

"You're slipping, Leon." The girl said.

"I went easy on him."

"Looks like things are worse than we thought. A lot worse."

"Hey!" They turned around to me.

"What are you doing?" I realized they could be kidnappers or thiefs. There was no way I could defend him or myself.

"What's it to you? It's no business of yours." Leon said.

I looked over at Sora, there was nothing I could do. Then I saw the sword in his hand.

"What is that?" I pointed to it.

"Again none of your business."

"Do you know him?" The girl asked.

"Umm kind of. I was on his world for a few days."

They looked at each other.

"We can't stay here any longer, we need to take him somewhere safe."

"Can you come with us?" The girl asked.

I shrugged my shoulders.

Leon lifted up Sora and the girl took the weapon, and then we left.

We went to a hotel in the another part of town.

"What do you know about this boy?"

"His name is Sora."

"What do you know about Sora, then?" Leon asked.

"That's all I know."

"All?"

"I didn't know him for long."

Then Sora started to wake up. The girl went over to him, and he sat up.

"You okay?"

"I guess…"

"Those creatures that attacked you are after the Keyblade. But it's your heart they really want because you weild the Keyblade."

"I'm so glad that you're okay, Kairi."

"Kairi? Who are you talking about? I'm the great ninja Yuffie."

"Huh?"

"I think you might have overdone it, Squall."

"That's Leon."

"The Keyblade…" Sora said.

_Keyblade._

"Yeah," Yuffie explained, "we had to get it away from you to shake off those creatures. It turns out that's how they were tracking you."

"It was the only way to conceal your heart from them. But it won't work for long. Still hard to believe that you of all people are the chosen one."

_His heart._

Leon took the Keyblade, and it instantly vanished and appeared in Sora's hands.

"Well, I suppose beggars can't be choosers."

"Why don't you start making sense! What's going on here?"

"There are other worlds out there, you don't know them because they were never connected. But they are now, and that's how the Heartless found you."

"The Heartless?"

"The ones who attacked you, you remember?" Yuffie asked.

"Those without hearts." Said Leon.

"The darkness in people's hearts—that's what attracts them."

"And there is darkness within every heart."

"Hey, Have you heard of someone named Ansem? He was our leader, and he studied the Heartless. He wrote a report about them, to understand and maybe even defeat them, once and for all."

"Where is it?"

"Scattered amongst the worlds." Leon said. "But we know we need the Keyblade to end them."

"So…this is the key?

"Exactly!"

"The Heartless have great fear of the Keyblade." Leon explained. "That's why they'll keep coming after you no matter what."

"Well I didn't ask for this." Sora intejected.

"The Keyblade chooses its master. And it chose you." Yuffie said.

"So tough luck."

"How did all this happen?" Sora asked. "I remember being in my room…" Then he jumped up. "Wait a minute! What happened to my home? My island? Riku! Kairi!"

"You know what?" Said Leon. "I really don't know. Maybe she does." He nodded to me.

I was sitting at the table the whole time, he never even noticed me.

"Hana? You're here too!"

"Yeah, it seems that way."

"What happened? Did you see Riku or Kairi?"

I shook my head. "I stayed behind on the island. Then there was a giant orb in the sky and monsters, and then I ended up here. I never saw them."

"Oh." He looked down. It actually made me uncomfortable to see him like that.

"Umm… so where did you get the Keyblade from?"

"Well, I'm not so sure. It just kind of appeared in my hand."

"Hey," Interrupted Yuffie, "I've heard the Keyblade can open all sorts of locks."

"Cool."

"Sooner or later," started Leon, "the Heartless will find you. You'd best prepare yourself."

"Prepare myself?"

"To fight for your life. Are you ready?"

"I'm ready!"

"Yuffie, let's go join Aerith. She should be there by now with the other visitors."

"Leon!" At that moment a black creature appeared into the room, like the other monsters but bigger.

"Yuffie, go!" She ran into the room next to us. Leon and Sora stood up to fight. "Sora, let's go!"

Leon threw the monster out the window, and jumped out. Sora ran outside too, and I followed.

"Don't bother with the small fry." Leon said once we caught up to him. "Find the leader!"

We ran past groups of monsters, they followed us everywhere we went. We ran to a part of town called the third district. We ran down the stairs, and I saw a door that lead to the first district. I tried to open it, but it wouldn't budge. I turned back and heard screaming up above. It was another duck with a dog. They flew through the air and landed on Sora.

"You've got to be kidding me." I muttered.

"The key!" The both of them shouted.

Then the entire district started to tremble.

"You guys…"

Before I knew it, the ground beneath my feet rose up and I rose into the air. I was standing on top of a block pillar. Monsters appeared from all sides, and I watched as the three defended themselves.

Once they were all defeated, a massive suit of armor dropped down from the sky, and assembled itself together. I watched as they killed each piece, one by one. Finally they defeated it, a heart flew out from inside it, and it disappeared.

I started clapping as the pillars came back down.

"Good job everybody, great teamwork."

"You couldn't have helped?"

"How? Call it ugly and hurt its feelings?"

"Um, excuse me?" The duck interrupted.

"Oh great, more talking animals."

"We finally found ya!" Said the dog.

"So, you were looking for me?" Sora asked.

They nodded.

"They, too, have been seeking the weilder of the Keyblade." Said Leon, as he and Yuffie walked up to us.

"Hey, why don't you come with us?" Asked the dog. "We can go to other worlds on our vessel."

Sora looked gloomy. "I wonder if I could find Riku and Kairi…"

"Of course." Said the duck.

The dog leaned in closer. "Are you sure?"

"Who knows? But we need him to come with us to help us find the king."

"Sora, go with them." Said Leon. "Especially if you want to find your friends."

He was still sad. "Yeah, I guess…"

"But you can't come along looking like that. Understand? No frowning. No sad face. Okay?"

"Yeah, ya gotta look funny, like us!" The dog said.

"This boat runs on happy faces."

"Happy?" Sora never looked up. Then he beamed up with the most ridiculous smile I had ever seen. The animals laughed at him.

"I'm done." I walked back to Leon and Yuffie.

"Okay, why not? I'll go with you guys."

"Donald Duck."

"Name's Goofy."

"I'm Sora."

"All for one, one for all." Said Goofy.

"Make sure you're prepared for the journey ahead of you. We don't know how far the Heartless have spread." Leon told Sora.

"Check out the shops here. They've got some pretty neat stuff!" Said Yuffie.

"This is from all of us." Aerith gave Sora a money pouch. "Spend it as you see fit. And this is from Leon." She gave Sora a bottle.

"Good luck!" Yuffie said.

"I hope you find your friends." Aerith said.

"Look out for each other." Said Leon. "Keep your spirits up."

Sora looked at me. "Do you want to come with us?"

Donald came over. "Uh Sora…"

"No, I think I will stay here, it's for the best."

"Well I will be seeing you then!"

I nodded, and Sora went to his new friends.

"So what will you do now?" Yuffie asked me.

"I don't know."

"You need a place to stay." Aerith said.

"I can find one."

"Wait," Yuffie said before I could leave, "why don't you work for Cid? He needs some extra help so that he can work in his other shop, and you can earn munny to stay somewhere."

"Well…"

"Come on, let's go ask!" Yuffie took me by the hand and led me to the shop.


	4. Chapter 4

Cid was reluctant at first. He said I would bring bad business because I wasn't a people person. But he liked his other store better, so he hired me anyway. I worked there most of the day. We didn't get that many people coming in so I just sat on a stool all day spacing out.

Since I couldn't defend myself, they decided to find me a place in the first district. Cid rented for me a one bedroom, one bath apartment. It was small but I didn't need much, since I didn't own anything. I had a bed with a bedside table, a mirror, and a lounge chair. I spent most of my nights in that chair; I placed it next to the window and watched outside.

And my days passed like that, I didn't do much of anything. I sat in silent thought almost all the time, but my thoughts were never silent, and now I wondered if they were even my own. I started to feel weaker and weaker all the time, and that disturbed me.

Aerith checked in on me every once in a while. She invited me to meals and things with the others, but I always declined. Sometimes she even made me noodles or a sandwich. She was kind.

One night, I didn't want to stay inside. I felt an urge to go out. I left and went out to another district. I didn't know why, I knew the monsters were out there. I thought of the night the island disapeared, and remembered that they hadn't attacked me. Maybe they wouldn't this time.

I walked all the way to the middle of the plaza in the second district without being attacked. I looked around. I felt something there with me.

_This way._

I went in the direction of the alley, where there was a waterline leading to the sewer. I walked down through the alley.

_Hana?_

My heart stopped altogether. That voice. I knew that voice. I couldn't remember from who, but hearing it gave me pain and sorrow in my heart. It couldn't be…

_I'm all alone, please come._

The voice was in front of me. I hesitated, but I took a few steps forward. I wanted to believe it was real.

_Over here._

I turned a corner to a dead end with some boxes. A hand gripped the side of a box, but I couldn't see her body. I heard her sobbing.

"Marli?"

_I'm scared, Hana._

I started shaking all over my body. The hand moved, the person moved to the corner. I secured myself on the other side of the wall. Slowly, I walked to see her. And I saw blood.

_STOP! HANA, PLEASE, NO!_

I screamed and stumbled back out of the dead end. I could hear her screaming at me. I clasped my ears and closed my eyes, but she wouldn't stop. Then in a second she stopped and all was quiet. Just like that night…

I looked out into the alley and there were monsters, at least ten of them. I backed into a corner and slunk to the floor. I didn't even try to defend myself; I sat, trembling with my hands over my head and waited for them to take my heart, they crept closer and closer.

Then Leon came running, their attention went to him. He sliced through them like paper, and they were all gone within a minute or two.

"What do you think you're doing out here?"

"I…I…" I was still shaking.

"You shouldn't be out here defenseless."

I nodded my head.

"Come on," he offered his hand, "I'll take you back to your place."

I swallowed and tried to regain my strength.

"I think I can manage on my own."

"Are you serious? Don't be an idiot, there's other Heartless out there."

"I said I'll manage!" I yelled.

He took a step back. "Alright, go then."

I got up and walked past him quickly, back to the gate. I saw Leon following me at a distance. I went to my tiny apartment; once I was in I slid down the door. I was breathing heavily.

_It will all be over soon._

It wasn't much longer. This disease that I had, that I couldn't eat, sleep, breathe, or even feel my heart beat, it would take me soon. Maybe then I could finally rest. Finally rest…

I passed the night like that. I saw the sun come up, and I knew I had to work. It was slow again that day, and I didn't look at the customers that came in. I acted like I was busy reading a magazine. At midday, someone came in.

"Can I help you?" I said without looking as I did to theothers.

"What were you doing last night?" I looked up. It was Leon.

"I was just taking a stroll."

"In the most dangerous part of town? You could have been killed."

I chuckled. "I seriously doubt that."

He gave a sigh. "It's my job to protect everyone in this town from the Heartless, but I can't protect every brainless girl that takes strolls in dark alleys."

"I never asked you to protect me."

"You don't have to, it's my duty."

"Well then I hereby relieve you, captain."

He gave a deeper sigh this time.

"Let me train you."

"Train me?"

"Yes, to protect yourself against the Heartless, just an hour or two a day is all and then you can stroll as much as you want around the town."

"I don't think so."

"Look, this isn't easy for me either! But I don't want your dead body on my conscience."

I thought for a minute, and then returned to my magazine.

"Will you leave if I say yes?"

He turned around and headed out. "Six sharp." And he left.

Ten minutes before six, Yuffie stepped into the shop.

"You really pissed Leon off."

"I know, it wasn't my fault though."

"Either way, you are going to pay for it in training."

She took me to an empty underground tower, then we went down from there to where Leon trained.

"Have you ever learned how to fight before?"

"Yes."

"Here take this." He handed me a long wooden stick.

"I'm supposed to fight with this?"

"Yeah, what other way would you fight?"

"My hands."

"You fought with your bare hands?"

"Is there a problem with that?"

"Well, you won't be able to fight the Heartless like that. Now come at me."

I attacked and he defended and pushed me back. I attacked again and again like that and he always deflected until he had me on the ground. We made another round, and I lasted a little longer. After half an hour I was too tired to keep going, and we took a break.

"Need a drink?" Yuffie asked.

I shook my head.

"You don't eat or drink much, do you?"

I shook my head again.

"You might feel better if you ate more." Aerith had come over to us.

I still didn't say anything.

"You're always so…grouchy." Said Yuffie.

"You don't seem healthy." Aerith said.

"And all of a sudden it's you business? Leave me alone."

"Let's start again?" Interrupted Leon.

We practiced for another twenty minutes then I had enough.

"Take this." He gave me a long knife.

"I don't think I should take that."

"How else will you protect yourself?"

"It's dangerous."

"For them, a little bit. Look it will at least stun them enough for you to run away. I will try to find you something better for you later."

In the end I took the knife, reluctantly.

I started wandering more and more in the other parts of town in the following days after practice. I found a place high above the city like a rooftop, and I could see a large part of the city from there. I stayed and sat there for a long time every chance I had because no one looked for me there. I was bitter because being there reminded me of the old place where me and my friends stayed. I started thinking of them a lot. I used to refraim from thinking of them because it made me worse and filled my heart with guilt, but here I couldn't help myself.

One night, while lost in thought, I felt something touch my back. I looked and it was a Heartless, but not like the other I had seen. It was tinier than the others and had short legs. Its beady eyes were slightly bigger, and I saw a spark inside them, something different than the others.

"What do you want?" I asked. "To take my heart?"

It cocked its head to the side a little.

"Then take it." I said as I turned away to gaze at the city. "Or leave."

Nothing happened for a while. I gave a side-glance and the little Heartless was still there. I tried to ignore it. Then it jumped past me and down to the ground; a few seconds later a group of Heartless rushed past me. They followed the little one, and in a few moments they over powered it. I stood up as I watched attack it. Something rose in my heart, it almost felt warm, then hot. I was angry at them for attacking a helpless creature and I couldn't stand to watch. I hardly even knew what I was doing when I jumped down (not sure how I didn't break my legs) and ran to it. I took the knife and cut through the others. They fought back but I defeated them within minutes. I surprised myself that I was able to take them out. I looked over to the little Heartless. It was lying on the ground, badly hurt. I went over and knelt beside it. Its eyes were closed. I poked it and it opened its heavy eyes. I carefully put my hand under its head and with the other I lifted it up onto my lap. I stared at it for a few seconds as it stared at me.

"I'll protect you from them."

I thought I saw it smile, and I gave a short smile too. It was the first time since that I gave a genuine smile. I cradled the little Heartless in my arms and walked back to the apartment with it.

The Heartless seemed to heal itself over the days. I left it in my room cuddled up in my bed. I knew I couldn't take it with me, the others would be angry. But as he got better he got more attatched to me. Once he followed me outside, and I had to take him back. He could hide in the shadows like the others, so the shut door wouldn't hold him for long. I bought a backpack to carry the Heartless in. I took it to work and left it under the desk, but he was restless there too. Once he escaped and crawled on the ceiling while a customer was there. Luckily he wasn't seen. After I would take it to practice. When they asked what it was for, I said it was full of books I would read later. They didn't question that even though they never really saw me read. We would stay together on that platform almost all night. I liked his company, since he never talked. He liked to curl up in my lap like a cat.

One day Aerith came to see me at the store.

"We are all having a dinner together tonight, why don't you come with us?"

"I'm busy."

"You're lying."

I didn't say anything.

"Okay, I am going to set a place for you tonight. Come if you want."

"But…"

"See you later!" And she left.

"What are you doing, Hana?" I asked myself as I walked to their hang out place with my backpack. "Well here goes nothing." I said as I opened the door.

"Well, you actually showed up." Cid remarked. He and Yuffie were sitting at the table. "Well, take a seat."

I sat next to Yuffie hoping that Leon wouldn't sit next to me.

"So, how've ya been? We never do talk much."

"She never really talks much anyways." Yuffie interrupted.

"I've been alright."

"Carrying a backpack around I see."

"Books."

"Right."

"You're here!" Said Aerith as she walked in from the kitchen with a huge bowl. "I'm happy you came."

"Thanks for having me."

"Woah!" Exclaimed Yuffie. "I didn't know you said nice things! Say something nice again."

"Oh…"

They talked with each other while Aerith set the table and we waited for Leon. Finally he came and everybody sat down to eat. Aerith put some noodles into my bowl.

"Oh, I'm not hungry."

They carried on, not giving me much attention. But it was fine with me; I didn't want to say much. Still, it was nice being there. I felt wanted. When everyone was finished, I helped Aerith clean up. When I brought the last dishes in, she asked me to help dry them. We worked silently, and then Aerith started a conversation.

"Have you ever had friends, Hana?"

"Everyone has friends."

"But you don't, do you. At least not anymore." I stayed quiet. "What do you think of us?"

"You are very kind people."

"That's nice of you to say. Why do you always keep to yourself?"

I was quiet again.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked. But you would be better off if you opened up to us."

We kept on working, and we were almost done. All the while I had this urge to tell her the truth. I wondered why I wanted to open up to her?

"I used to love music." I said; it startled her a bit. "They told me I had a beautiful voice."

"Your friends?"

I nodded. "They were the people I cared most for. They were all I had."

"What happened to them?"

I didn't respond for a while. I ran my mind for something to say.

"I understand, I'm sorry I asked."

"You…know there's something wrong with me. But you don't want to say anything. So you're trying to help and it's sweet, it really is, but there isn't anything you can do for me. But thank you, for caring at least."

She was quiet as I finished the dishes while she made drinks.

"Help me take these out?" She handed me the tray. "And also, I'm not going to give up on you. Neither will they."

I nodded. We served the drinks and she gave me one. I dumped it down a plant when no one was watching to be polite.

I left early, I said goodbyes and went to my usual place at night. I sat on the edge and let the little Heartless out. I saw inside an empty jar.

"What's this? Did you steal this from the kitchen?" I sniffed it; there was peanut butter inside. "So you like peanut butter, huh?"

They are so kind to me, I though as I sat there. But why? I never showed them the slightest affection. Why do they want to help me? And Aerith. She was the kindest of all, and sympathetic. Why did she show me such sympathy?

_You don't deserve this._

You're right. I don't deserve it. Their kindness, affection, and sympathy was waisted on me. If they knew who I truly was they would lock me away like they had in my world. The person I hid inside…

Wait a mintue. That was a voice in my head. That's who I was hearing. I never even realised that I was talking to it either.

"Who are you?" I asked to the thin air.

_Who am I?_

I could feel a presence there with me then. Something strong.

"Who are you!" I was standing now. "Show yourself."

I turned and looked every way, but saw nothing. Then again she was in my head, but she felt so real right then. I looked down at my Heartless that stared bewildered at me. Maybe I was making it up.

"Sorry if I scared you." He kept staring at me, and then he looked behind me. I turned around, and there I saw a girl with a long black gown and hood.

_You called me. So here I am._

I didn't hear her speak, I heard her in my head.

"Who are you?"

_Isn't it obvious? I'm you._

"No you aren't. You can't be."

_Well, a part of you. But let's not dwell on the details._

"Why are you controling my thoughts?"

_You're catching on, are you? I've been giving you some slack lately for your last days. I have showed you mercy, girl. Given you a break from your torment before I can take you once and for all! You should be thanking me._

"What do you mean you are going to take me?"

_You know exactly what I mean, though you did not know it was me who was working in you._

"You mean that you are my disease?"

_I am not a disease. _And in the blink of an eye she was nose to nose with me. _I am a parasite._

And she disapeared. But she didn't really. She was still in my concious. She was still here with me. And now I couldn't get her out of my mind. She was taking my heart and it terrified me.


	5. Chapter 5

"Is there anything I can get for you?" Cid asked as he went out for lunch. He usually didn't come in to see me, but today he did.

"A jar of peanut butter."

"Peanut butter? Is that what you eat?"

I nodded.

"Alright then. One jar of peanut butter."

A half hour later, Cid brought my jar of peanut butter. I put my backpack on the counter and put the jar inside. I opened it a little to see him eating. Then Leon came in the store and I quickly zipped it up.

"What do you really have in there?"

"I told you, books."

"You're lying. I saw you looking inside. You're hiding something in there."

"I'm not hiding anything."

"Then let me see."

"No."

He sighed, the way he always did when I was around him. "Nevermind, I need some potions."

I got the box out and let him pick.

"Guess who I just saw out at the gates."

"Who?"

"Sora, Donald, and Goofy."

"So they're back."

"I bet they will be coming by the store sometime today."

I put the potions away, and some more customers came through the door.

"Well speak of the devil."

I looked up to see Sora's beaming face.

"How is your journey going?" Leon asked.

"Great! We've explored lots of worlds with our rocket."

"Gummi ship." Donald corrected.

"Right. How are things here?"

"Not good. More Heartless are showing up inside the first district. It's everything I can do to keep them outside."

"Isn't there some way we can fight them?"

"Well…"

Before Leon could go further, an empty jar popped out of my bag. They all stared at it.

"Umm, Hana. What's in there?" Sora asked

"Nothing. Books." Then the bag moved a bit. "Okay, I'll admit it. I have a cat." Then the Heartless came out and took the jar back inside, first glairing at all the people surrounding it. I put my face in my hands.

"Uhh, ya know. I don't think that's a cat." Goofy said.

"You're keeping a Heartless in your backpack!?" Leon yelled. "You take it everywhere with you?"

"Indi."

"What?"

"His name is Indi."

"I can't believe—ugh! Hana, you can't keep a Heartless as a pet. It will take your heart."

"Excuse me. Who gave you permission to tell me what I can and can't do? He's harmless, look at him he's not like the others!" I said as I opened the bag and pulled him out.

"That monster is probably what is attracting the others! You're endagering everybody."

"They didn't like him, they tried to kill him!"

"You can't keep it!"

"Like hell I can't!"

We starred at each other for a second then he stormed out. "I want it gone by this afternoon." He said before he slammed the door.

"Geez." I murmured.

"Hana, he's right."

"Can it, Sora." I said as I sat back down. "Look at him, he's won't hurt you."

He was looking close up at it now.

"He really doesn't attack anything?" He slowly poked it a few times. "I've never seen Leon so mad before." He added.

"Hmph. Whatever."

"You aren't going to get rid of it, are you?"  
"It's none of your concern. Did you need something?"

Sora looked frustrated. "No, we'll leave." And they left too.

I let out a huge sigh. "You've really done it now." The Heartless cocked his head to the side again. "Okay, I've done it."

I went to practice later, although I wasn't in the mood and I knew Leon wouldn't be either. Underground, I found Sora, Goofy, Donald, Leon, and Aerith together.

"Hana, why would you do this? It's dangerous." Aerith asked me.

"What?" It hurt to hear it coming from her. "I'm sorry that I want to help a defenseless creature, that was really unfair of me."

"You can't keep it." Leon said again.

"It never did you any harm." I put my backpack on the ground, and everyone took a step back.

"It won't hurt you."

"It's not a pet. If you only knew how many hearts of our citizens it has taken, you would never have taken it."

"It never did anything like that."

"How do you know?"

"I—well…"

"I gave you the chance to get rid of it, now you have to give it to me."

He bent over and picked the backpack up, and I snatched the other side.

"You can't! You have no right."

"I have the right to protect my people."

"Let go!"

He grabbed my hand and forced me off. It was strong enough to knock me on the ground.

"Leon, wait…" Murmured Aerith. But before she finished I did something none of them saw coming. I jumped up and in a flash I punched Leon in the mouth, and knocked him back, taking the bag with me.

They stared at me silently, and I tried to cool myself down. But I was raging inside and I couldn't control it.

"Hana?" Sora asked.

"This was a mistake. I should just go."

And I ran up the stairs. Sora yelled for me to come back. I ran out of the underground and back to the town.

I had to go where they wouldn't find me, to the platform for starters. Once I got back I unzipped the bag and let the Heartless out.

"Don't worry. I will keep you safe." He walked to me and grabbed my pants, as if he understood me.

I was such a fool. To think that I could trust people again, to think anyone would accept me. No I had to be alone; there was no other way. I sat by the edge, the Heartless sat beside me.

"I never was like this, Indi. Well, maybe a little. But there was a time when I was always happy." Why was I saying this to him? But even so, as I spoke I found myself unable to go further, so I stopped for a while, then began again..

"I had a brother, and two best friends." I stopped again. This was the first I ever talked about them out loud.

"I never even mourned them." I breathed in deeply. "Never one tear for them."

"That's very touching." I whipped around. There was a tall woman behind me dressed in black, and holding a staff.

I stood up. "Who are you?"

"Hope, my dear girl. For your poor soul." She smiled, but it didn't comfort me any. I pulled my dagger out.

"I meant your name."

"Be calm, child. My name is Maleficent, and I believe I can help you."

"What do you know about my problems?"

"A good deal. I have watched you for some time now."

"Sorry, I don't want help from a creep like you."

"Hear me out, I know what you want and I can give it to you."

"What do you think I want?"

"You want rest. You want to finish with this life."

That was actually what I wanted. I lowered my weapon.

"You are looking for a way out, and I can make it happen."

"I can't die."  
"Yes you can. But there is something inside you that is keeping you alive, because it hasn't fully…grown yet."

"You mean the voice."

"Yes, she already controls you. And she is relentless in her endeavors against you. She will completely take you, but it seems she is taking her time. She needs help to finish, and I can help her."

"Basically you want to help her destroy me."

"Isn't it what you want too?"

I didn't know what to say, because as crazy as it sounded, it was all true. I was desperately looking for a way out. I had already done crazier things to die.

"Okay."

"You will let me help you?"

"Just get it over with!" I yelled. "I don't want to be like this anymore."

She smiled again. She waved up her hand and a black portal opened.

"Then come."

I looked down at my Heartless.

"Stay. Find Sora, he might protect you from now on."

And I walked forward. Those words rang in my head again. 'We can't let fear stop us.' It was time to accept my fate once and for all. I took a short stop in front of the darkness, and then stepped through.

The little Heartless obeyed what the girl said. He sat there, watching after her, and was sad to part from her. He remembered she said to 'find Sora.' That was the name they used for the Keybearer.

He jumped down into the plaza, and went to find Sora. The Heartless remembered a plaza most of the people lived in, but it was the part he couldn't enter by itself. So he ran to different places, but never found anybody. He went to an alley and looked around, but he still couldn't find anyone. He ran down other streets, and finally came to a dead end. He thought the boy had already gone, lost in another world. The Heartless didn't know what to do now, and he sat and waited.

It was only a few minutes when Sora, Goofy, and Donald came threw the firey door that the Heartless was at. The Heartless stood up and stared at Sora, and was happy.

"Huh? What are you doing here?"

The Heartless tugged at Sora's pants.

"What's it doing?" Donald asked.

"Ya know, I think it wants to show us somethin'."

"Maybe something happened to Hana?" Sora guessed.

The Heartless nodded, and ran off.

"Come on!"

He only ran a short way before a gang of Heartless stopped him. Seeing them he ran back behind Sora. The three got ready to fight, but then all the Heartless disapeared, and behind them stood a silver haired boy.

"There you are. What's going on?" He asked.

"Riku! He walked to him and grabbed Riku's face.

"Hey, hey! Cut it out!"

"I'm not dreaming this time, right?"

"I hope not. Took forever to find you."

"Riku!" Sora said as he smiled. "Wait a second, where's Kairi?"

"Isn't she with you?"

Sora looked down.

"Well, don't worry. I'm sure she made it off the island, too. We're finally free. Hey, she might even be looking for us now. We'll all be together again soon. Don't worry. Just leave everything to me. I know this-"

At that moment a Heartless appeared behind Riku and lunged for him, but Sora took him out first.

"Leave it to who?" Sora asked.

"Sora, what did you-"

"I've been looking for you and Kairi too, with their help." The others nodded.

"Who are they?"

"Ahem." Said the duck. "My name is-"

"We've visited so many places and worlds, looking for you."  
"Really? Well, what do you know? I never would have guessed."

"Oh, and guess what?" The dog interrupted. "Sora's the Keyblade master."

"Who would've thought it?" Exclaimed the duck.

"What's that mean?" Sora asked him.

"So this is called a Keyblade?"

Sora looked up to see the sword in Riku's hands.

"Huh? Hey, give it back." Sora tried to snatch it away, but Riku jumped away. He looked at it for a moment, and then threw it back to Sora.

"Catch."

"Whoa. Okay, so, you're coming with us, right? We've got this awesome rocket. Wait 'til you see it!"

"No, he can't come!" The duck yelled.

"What?"

"Forget it!"

"Oh, come on! He's my friend!"

"I don't care!"

"He's gone!" The dog shouted out.

The other two looked up, and it was true, he was nowhere to be seen.

"Riku? Nice going. Oh, well. At least he's okay. And who knows? Maybe we'll run into Kairi soon, too."

The Heartless went back to Sora and tugged his pants again.

"Oh right! Hana!"

The Heartless lead them back to the platform, and his followers looked around confused when they didn't see her.

"But she ain't here." Goofy said.

"What's the big idea?" Donald said irritated.

"Why did you bring us here." Sora asked, kneeling down to the Heartless. It thought for a moment. Maybe it could act out what happened since it couldn't speak. It lowered its antenna's and made horns on its head, and stamped around like an evil person. Then it pointed to the place Hana disapeared and moved its arms around like they had vanished, and after stucks its arm through the other and played dead.

When it looked to see if they understood, they all stared at it in confusion.

"I don't get it." Sora said. "Let's go ask if anyone has seen her recently."

They had to fight their way through the other Heartless all the time. The little Heartless stayed close to them the whole time. They went to a vacant house close by. Inside were all the people Hana had yelled at.

"You guys, have you seen Hana?"

"She ran off, remember?" Said Leon. "Do you really think she would come back?"

"No, it's just…" He hesitated, then looked back to the Heartless and picked it up. "We found Indi alone, he seems worried."

"Why would you bring that thing back here?" The Heartless didn't like this guy. "Throw it out."

"But we asked if something was wrong with Hana, and it nodded. It took us to a platform, but she wasn't there. I think she's gone."

"That Heartless might have led you into a trap, you shouldn't have followed it."

"But it didn't."

"Leon," the pretty girl walked over, "maybe you should listen. That Heartless was attatched to her, it wouldn't leave her side."

Leon looked down and thought. "We'll look for her."


	6. Chapter 6

I found myself on the ground. I somhow passed out again. I stood up to see where I was, but it was hard to tell. Everything was dark. But there were windows through which the night sky gleamed into the darkness. I walked over and looked out onto a dry, rocky plain.

I watched outside the window as I waited for someone. Then I heard the noise the darkness made, and knew someone was there. The candles on the walls lit with a green light, but I didn't look back inside. I was staring up at the few stars in the sky.

"I'm so glad you didn't wander off, my dear."

"Hana?"

I knew that voice. I looked around to see Riku next to Maleficent.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

He shrugged his shoulders. "I guess the same reason you're here."

"I seriously doubt that."

"Riku you know the castle. Won't you give us a moment."

I looked around and saw we were in a throne room. I looked back out into the sky as Riku left.

"Are you ready to begin? I have my little scientist ready for you."

"Wait, can I have a final request?"

There was a moment of silence, I guess she didn't like the question.

"If you must. What is it that you want?"

"I want to sing. Do you have an instrument?"

"Would you know how to play it?"

"I can make do."

She sighed. "There's a piano."

"Good, I already know how to play that."

A Heartless appeared at the door. "My Heartless will show you there. Make it quick."

I followed the Heartless through dark hallways and passages. Then there was a sort of lift that went in all different directions, and then the Heartless opened a door for me. I stepped into a drawing room. There were painting tables, sofa, bookshelves, and a table for games. In the corner stood an ivory black piano.

I slowly walked up to it, and felt its keys. I had a piano similar to it once. I carefully sat down, and tried to think of a song. It had been a year since I sang, and longer since I played the piano. I wondered if I'd still be any good. I played a few keys to get the feel again, and the sound went rushing through my heart and overwhelmed me like it always had before. But this time, it was sadness that I felt.

Two a.m., where do I begin?1  
Crying off my face again.  
The silent sound of loneliness  
Wants to follow me to bed.

My hands began to shake against the keys, but I held myself together. 

I'm a ghost of a girl  
That I want to be most.  
I'm the shell, of a girl  
That I used to know well.

Dancing slowly in an empty room.  
Can the lonely take the place of you?  
I sing myself a quiet lullaby,  
Let you go and let the lonely in  
To take my heart again.

I took a deep breath mostly to calm my nerves. But pain started to take the place of the sadness. It felt worse than the knife that was in my ribs.

Too afraid to go inside,  
For the pain of one more loveless night.  
Cause the loneliness will stay with me.  
And hold me till I fall asleep.

I'm the ghost of a girl  
That I want to be most.  
I'm the shell of a girl  
That I used to know well.

My voice started to shake with the rising notes, but I managed to sway a little with the rhythm as the music took me over.

Dancing slowly in an empty room.  
Can the lonely take the place of you?  
I sing myself a quiet lullaby  
Let you go and let the lonely in  
To take my heart again.

Broken pieces of  
A barely breathing story,  
Where there once was love…

That one word, 'love'. I could hardly say it, and it burned in my mind.

Now there's only me  
And the lonely.

Dancing slowly in an empty room.  
Can the lonely take the place of you?  
I sing myself a quiet lullaby  
Let you go and let the lonely in  
To take my heart again...

My whole body trembled as I played the last chords.

"That was sad."

I said nothing. There was nothing else I wanted to say.

"I knew there was something wrong with you, but I never knew how sad you were."

"Why don't you leave, Riku."

"You don't have to be alone."

"You don't understand."

"I don't. You never say anything about yourself."

"It's for the best. Now please, just go."

"I know what she's going to do to you. I heard her talking with that guy in the lab. Come with me on my mission, it could save you if she sees you're useful."

"You can't save me."

"I could try."

"You can't help me!" I lashed out. "Okay? Leave!"

He didn't respond, or leave. He stood there looking at me.

"I'm already lost, there's nothing you can do for me."

He kept staring at me. He looked serious, almost malevolent. He extended an arm out and in an instant darkness surrounded me and I was swallowed again.

Back in Traverse Town, the Heartless followed the Keybearer back to the first district. It had to hop on his leg so that it could pass through the door.

"Hey!" He yelled as the Heartless ran off.

"You can't stay here. You have to go back."

He tried to go after the Heartless but it ran away. They left him alone and went to a store to collect supplies. The Heartless followed after them, and managed to slip into the ship unseen.

"Where to now?" Sora asked.

"Well let's see, with this new nagavigator we can find other worlds farther out." The dog responded.

"We have to make sure we secure all the worlds, so let's get a move on!" The duck said.

They were attacked by Heartless in the sky too. The ship rocked as it went from side to side deflecting lasers and random astroid formations.

"Let's go there!" Sora exclaimed.

"Sounds good to me!" Shouted the duck.

They drew nearer to the world. On one side was a huge city, with a clock tower high above the other buildings, and on the other side was a sea and a fantastic forest and over the sea was a ship flying above the water. The group stood to get ready to land, and the Heartless jumped onto the boy's leg before they were beamed out of the ship.

"Hey! How did you get here?" The Heartless looked up at the Keybearer.

"It musta stowed away." Said the dog.

"Well, it needs someone to look after it. It wouldn't hurt to keep it with us, right?"

"No!" Shouted the duck.

"But Hana would be mad if anything happened to it!"

"It can't come with us!"

"Indi is too weak to defend himself!"

"It doesn't have a name, you're going to get attatched to it too!"

Sora picked up the Heartless and put it on his shoulder.

"It's coming with us!"

"Ahh, phewy." The other grumbled.

I found myself in a wooden room. I wasn't too surprised, I knew what was happening when I saw the darkness. I looked around at the maps and things. Behind me was a window. I looked out expecting to see the ocean, but instead I saw nothing but the black night sky. I looked down and I saw several feet below the waves of the sea. I was in a flying ship. I heard footsteps behind me.

"Why did you bring me with you?"

"I couldn't bear to see her kill you."

"I'm already dead. Can't you see."

"But your not."

"Come here."

I took his hand, and placed it where my heart was.

"Woah, wait—I can't-"

"Shut up."

He was quiet, and then I saw the color was away from his face.

"You're so cold."

"What do you feel?"

"It's nothing, just still…"

I let go.

"I don't have a heartbeat, Riku. There is no blood running through my veins anymore. I shouldn't be living but I am."

He stared at me completely bewildered."But how?"

"Smee! Who are these brats?"

We turned around to see two pirates who had just entered the room.

"Maleficent sent me to keep this ship in order." Riku replied.

"Maleficent? Why would she send some kid like you? I can run my ship-"

Riku lifted a hand and Heartless appeared around the two men.

"No! Wait!"

"Do you believe me now?"

"Alright, alright. I believe you!"

"Let's go up deck to the bridge." He looked back at me, but differently before. "Come on."

We started walking when Riku stopped behind the desk. He bent over. I looked, and who I saw made me gasp.

"That's Kairi!"

She sat there motionless. Her eyes were open but they didn't move.

"She's been here the whole time? What happened to her?"

"I found her in the castle. She lost her heart."

"I'm sorry."

"Me too."  
"Why are you taking her with us?" I asked as Riku picked her up.

"To make an example." He walked away and I followed.

The three landed on the flying ship with the Heartless. Sora walked around on board. He looked back for the others, but found they weren't there. The Heartless looked up and then left Sora's shoulder.

"Hey! Come back!"

But it had already run off. Sora kept walking, and then a voice came out of the darkness.

"I didn't think you'd come, Sora."

Sora looked up and saw Riku.

"Good to see you again."

"Where are Donald and Goofy?"

"Are they that important to you? More important than old friends?"

I was sitting on the side rail near Riku. I didn't understand what Riku meant. I knew he had chosen a different path than Sora, but what was this about Sora's other friends.

"Instead of worrying about them, you should be asking about her."

"Kairi!" Sora yelled when he saw her.

"That's right. While you were off goofing around, I finally found her."

Sora ran to them, but the pirate stopped him.

"Not so fast. No shenanigans abourd my vessel, boy."

"Riku, why are you siding with the Heartless?"

"The Heartless obey me now, Sora. Now I have nothing to fear."

I finally realized what was going on, and anger at him was swelling up in me.  
"You're stupid! Sooner or later they'll swallow your heart.

"Not a chance. My heart's too strong."

"Riku…" Sora pleaded. It was sad to watch.

"I've picked up a few other tricks as well. Like this, for instance."

Riku held up his hand. A Heartless that looked exactly like Sora rose from below Sora's feet.

"You can go with your friends now." And Sora fell through a trap door.

"Let's get under way, already. And keep Sora away from Kairi until we're ready to land." He said to the pirate. Then he glanced at me, and I glared at him. He took Kairi and went inside the ship.

"That scurvy brat thinks he can order me around!" One of the pirates exclaimed to the other.

"What shall we do, Captain Hook?"

"Nothing! The hold is crawling with Heartless. Let them keep an eye on the brats."

"But, Captain, you-know-who is also down-"

"Shh…Did you hear that, Smee? Oh, that dreadful sounds!"

"No, Captain."

I looked down and saw a crocodile swimming to the boat.

"Are you quite sure? Did I imagine it? Oh, my poor nerves!"

"Let's go inside, Captain."

"Yes, I think so."

They left, and I was alone. Except for the few Heartless on board and the crocodile, but as always they didn't notice me either. Then to my surprise my little Heartless jumped up in front of me.

"Indi! How did you get here?"

It looked so happy.

"Indi, I mean it. You have to stay with Sora from now on. I said I'd protect you and I can't anymore, so he'll have to."

It looked sad then. It actually gave me those sad puppy eyes, begging to stay.

"No. Go on. Find him."

It drooped its head. It lumped off the railing and made its way down the ship.

How could Riku do that to Sora? His own friend? I wanted to go to him and tell him to make things right. But he was too far gone for that. Besides I didn't want to waste my time anymore. I wanted to end it now, I was tired of waiting.

But if I could save their friendship, maybe I could die without so much regret; one good act to make up for the rest. No, it wouldn't make up for the rest, but it seemed like the right thing to do. So I decided to try. I didn't have much time left.

I walked down inside the ship back to the cabin. When I got there I already heardvoices inside. I didn't open the door, but instead cracked it a little to listen in. It was Riku talking with that Captain Hook.

"…Maleficent says she's not one of them. Hoist anchor as soon as possible. Leave all the dead weight behind, including her."

"After the trouble of capturing her? And why those seven? What is Maleficent planning, anyways?"

"Who knows? As long as it means getting Kairi's heart back, I couldn't care less."

"You're waisting your time! The Heartless have devoured that girl's heart. I'll stake the other hand it's lost forever."

"I will find it no matter what."

"Uhh…Captain?"

It was Smee speaking through a tube.

"What is it?"

"The prisoners have escaped. What's more Peter Pan is with them."

"Blast that Peter Pan."

That's all I heard. I knew they would be leaving soon to find the others and I didn't want to be caught easedropping. I hurried back to the upper deck and went back to the side railing where I was. I couldn't believe what I heard Riku say. I didn't know him, but I knew the old him wouldn't say things like that. He had changed for the worse, hardly the boy I met on the island. I sat there for a long time, wanting to go back to Maleficent. But Riku didn't want me to die. Why was he acting like this to me?

"Hey, come on I'm leaving."

Riku ran up to me with Kairi in his arms.

"I'm not going."

"Why?"

"I'm afraid I'd be dead weight."

"I didn't know you were easedropping."

"I'm glad I did. I've learned how big of an idiot you are."

"I'm just doing my job."

"You're throwing people around like nothing!"

"I thought you would understand, you hate people."

"I don't hate people."

"Really? Have you seen the way you act around them? You have this hateful look on your face all the time like you want to to murder someone, and then you look distant and sad."

"I don't do that."

"Ha, have you looked in the mirror."

I glared at him.

"Why are you treating Sora like this?"

"That traitor? He left me."

"He didn't leave you, didn't you hear him? He's been traveling to all different worlds looking for you two, you idiot!"

"With his new friends."

"So what about his new friends? Didn't he have other friends on the island? Just because he met some new people doesn't mean he's replacing you."

"He doesn't care any more for me. He left me for better people, better places…"

We stood in silence for some seconds.

"You don't understand the lonely, miserable path you are starting."

"It won't be like that. Once Kairi wakes up we will be together."

"Do you think she will be okay with everything you are doing?"

"She'll understand."

"For you're sake I hope she doesn't.

He glared at me.

"I shouldn't have brought you here."

"No, you shouldn't have."

"Malifecent will wonder where you've been, let's go."

"I'm not going anywhere with you."

"Don't be stupid, come on."

"If she wants me so badly than she can come get me."

"Fine then."

He disapeared into the darkness with Kairi still in his arms, I felt bad for the poor girl. I looked down and watched the crocodile.

A few minutes later Sora, Donald, Goofy, and my Heartless came running on deck. Again they didn't notice me.

"Quite a codfish, that Riku—running off with that girl without even saying goodbye." That was Captain Hook.

"Run off where? Tell me, where did he go?"

"To the ruins of Hollow Bastion, where Maleficent resides. But you won't be going there."

Captain Hook took out a lantern with a fairy inside.

"Unless you intend to leave your little pixie friend behind?"

"No…" Sora let down his weapon.

"Hand over the Keyblade and I'll spare your lives. Be glad I'm merciful, unlike the Heartless. So, which will it be? The Keyblade or the plank?"

A ticking noise came from the ocean. It was the crocodile.

"It's him! The crocodile that took me hand! Oh, Smee! He's after me other hand! I can't stay here! Go away! Oh, I can't stand the sight of him! Smee, you take care of them!"

Smee himself wasn't intimidating, but the Heartless surrounded him and forced him onto the plank. He would rather jump than give up the Keyblade. Wait, the Keyblade…

"Sora!" I yelled. He looked up and saw me.

"Hana, is that you?"

"Sora, just give them the Keyblade!"

He shook his head and backed away.

"Fly, Sora! Just believe, and you can do it!"

I looked around but I didn't see who said that.

"Sora, no!"

And he jumped off.

The next thing I knew he was over our heads. Some other kid flew down, took the fairy, and released it. They both landed on the ship. They were actually flying.

"Thanks, Peter."

"Hey, don't mention it. You didn't think I'd leave you and Tink behind, did you?"

Then Smee ran away and left the others to fight the Heartless off. All of them were flying around the place, killing them off one by one. Finally the battle was over.

Sora flew down to where I was.

"Hana, how did you get here?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Wait a minute. You told me to give them my Keyblade."

"Only you can wield it, you idiot. It would have disappeared and come back to you."

"Oh yeah. Anyway, you're alright now."

"Yeah."

"We took care of your Heartless."

I'd forgotten about the little guy. I looked around and saw him sitting near my feet, but he didn't look at me.

"Hey, Indi. I'm sorry about early." The Heartless still wouldn't look at me. "It looks like I've got some more time, want to stay with me?"

It looked up at me for a few seconds. Then it smiled again; at least it looked like a smile. It climbed up my legs up to my shoulder, and clung there.

"Hey." The other boy whispered and motioned for us to follow. We followed him to the door for the Captain's cabin. He knocked on it.

"Is that you, Smee? Did you finish them off?"

The boy held his nose with his hand and mimicked the voice of Smee.

"Aye, Captain. They walked the plank, every last one of them."

The Captain ran out without even noticing us. He looked around for Smee, and then the boy poked the Captain in the bag with a dagger.

"P-Peter Pa—blast you!"  
"Ready to make a splash, you codfish? Now it's your turn to walk the plank!"

The Captain wouldn't go without a fight first. They battled for a long time. But Sora and his friends won in the end, and the Captain ended up in the water. He swam as hard as he could from that crocodile.

When everything was over and it was almost time to go, Sora became sad. He stood staring into the distance.

"Uh," Goofy started, "Kairi couldn't wake up, so maybe she's really lost her-"

Donald shushed him before he could go further.

"Sora." Peter said.

"I still can't believe it." In that moment Sora perked up. "I really flew. Wait 'til I tell Kairi. I wonder if she'll believe me. Probably not."

I admired that kid. When everything looked bad, he could still find the good things in life. But he didn't understand really what happened to Kairi.

"You can bring her to Neverland sometime. Then she can try it herself."

"If you believe, you can do anything, right? I'll find Kairi. I know I will. There's so much I want to tell her about flying, the pirates, and everything else that's happened."

The fairy flew down to Peter.

"What's that, Tink? What about the clock tower? You say there's something there? Let's go check it out!"

"Yeah! Let's go!"

And they all flew away. But at the last second Sora remembered I was there.

"Hana, you want to come? All it takes is some pixie dust."

"I think I'll stay. Just don't forget me here, okay."

"Alright, we'll be back."

1 The Lonely by Christina Perri


	7. Chapter 7

"So, what should we do with you now?" Sora asked me. "I mean, are you coming with us?"

_Do you know what his heart is made of?_

"No…"

_You can't see it, can you?_

"No, what?" Sora asked.

_That is one of the things I'm specially equiped for, you know. Seeing people's hearts._

"Hana?"

"What?" I said snapping back into reality. Sora, Donald, and Goofy were all staring at me uneasily.

"Do you want us to take you back to Traverse Town?"

"No."

"Hana, you're not healthy or fit to go with us…"

"I'm scaring you, you meant to say."

"It's not…"

"Alright." I said standing up, and walking back to look out the window. "It's about time anyways that you found out that… I'm not completely sane."

"It's not your fault though…"

"It is entirely my fault. Do not pretend like you know me. The few who did are no longer here."

There was silence.

"Hana, I'm sor…"

"Take me back."

That was the last thing I would tell them. I wouldn't hear anymore. If I told them anything else I would spill everything. Might as well keep them in the dark. It was better. They started the ship as I stared out into the universe. It was dark. There was hardly any stars left.

"_Light, its all light."_

"Did you say something?" Sora asked.

"Huh?" I looked back at him.

"I thought you said… said… Hana?"

"What?" I turned around to face him.

"Did your eyes change color?"

They don't change color, you idiot. That was what I said, but my mouth didn't move. I looked down at my hands and flexed them. But it wasn't me moving. Then I realized what was happening: she was taking control.

"_But of course, we know that his heart must have darkness, as all hearts do. And yes, there is one teeny, tiny speck. But it's so small that it's unrecognizable. No wonder the Keyblade chose him. But, then, why do the Heartless chase after him? When they only seek after hearts corrupted by darkness._"

I liked my lips, which made my heart go into my throat. She looked up, and all their attention was on me with fear in their eyes.

"_Let's find out, shall we?"_

Then I felt darkness swell inside me and it released from the tips of my fingers. The three took their weapons out.

"Hana!" Sora shouted.

"_No. Not Hana. I am the terrifying Xena."_

She lifted my hand and sent darkness bursting out at Donald. In ropes, they closed in around him and left him tangled up before he had a chance.

"_Neat trick, huh? Care to see another?"_

Next she aimed at Goofy, who, more prepared, dodged and fought them. While Goofy fought, Sora attacked me. She shot another web at him. He managed to slice through him. In the next moment Goofy went down too.

So it was me and Sora.

"_Now what? Who will protect you?"_

"I don't need protection. I can defend them and myself.

She chuckled menacingly. It frightened me to hear it in my own voice.

"_A boy and his delusions. Your courage is touching. You will die with that delusion."_

I tried, as I had the entire time, to regain control of my body. But now I was trying harder to stop her. Sora fought her, but she was too strong. He fell to the ground, encased in the same darkness that held Donald and Goofy.

She slicked back my hair.

"_That was too easy. Far too easy for a victory against the Keyblade Master. Well, I can't complain. Now, time to collect."_

He struggled to break free, so did the others. They screamed at me, but I felt so powerless. There was nothing I could do. But there had to be someway. I couldn't standby and do nothing.

She grabbed Sora by his throat and began to squeeze. She chuckled as he chocked.

Then in the moment everything seemed lost, and I knew there was no hope. Randomly, my memory flashed back to the hand that came through the light to save me from the darkness. My hand let go of Sora's neck a little. She stared at my hand, angry and confused, then started choking Sora again.

I remembered my brother, and my friends. I thought of the nights we spent together. All the happy memories flooded back to me. And little by little, as I concetrated on those things, she lost control and I gained it back. Then, in the flash of a moment, I was in control.

I flung myself back off of Sora, breathing heavily. It hurt my lungs and throat to breathe so hard. The three of them were staring at me, still tied up. Then the control panel dinged. They must have set it on autopilot, and we arrived in Traverse Town. I stumbled to my feet, and quickly left.

They didn't follow me but I didn't dare stop running, not until I got to my apartment.

_You idiot! I had them! I had them and you let them go! He was supposed to be my great prize, my first bounty, the Keybladde Master! And you ruined it!_

I tried to push her away again, concentrating on the force I used earlier.

_That won't work again. I won't let you take me so easily._

I slammed the door behind me and fell to the floor.

"Get out of my head!"

_I'm done with you. I will end you._

A searing pain went through the inside of my body. She meant it; she was killing me from inside.

_Get up._

I slowly rose to my feet, but I couldn't stand up all the way. The pain was so intense I was doubled over. Then someone knocked at the door.

"Hana?"

It was Leon. They already found out what had happened.

_Allow me._

Seizing my body, she rushed me to the window, and, opening it, jumped out and onto the roof next door.

"No!"

I fought her off, and staggered a bit as we both struggled for control.

"_What's the matter with you? I'm giving you what you want."_

"It's not right."

"_You're a coward. You say you want death but in your heart you are terrified of it."_

"You're wrong!"

"_Idiot girl, I live in your heart! I know every inch of it, in fact I know it better than you. And death is not your desire."_

"Then what is?"

"_Redemption."_

We were both still as I processed what she told me.

"_I am many things, and above all a liar. But, there is no reason I should lie to you know. You should be honest with yourself before your life comes to an end."_

"I…"

"There she is!"

I whirled around to see Leon, Sora, Donald, and Goofy leaving my apartment.

I ran off on the rooftops away from them, with a speed that was not my own. Once I was within the third district, I jumped down and ran to the fountain, breathing heavily.

"Hana!"

"Stop!" I yelled at them. "Don't come closer, or I'll… I'll…"

"We want to help." Said Leon. "That's all we've ever wanted is to help you."

I gave a nervous laugh. "Fools. You're all fools. For whatever reason that you have shown me kindness before, there is no reason to be kind to me now. You know what I am."

"But that's not you." Said Sora.

I looked away, back to the fountain. Watching the crystal water glimmer.

"You're sick. We've always known it, but we never knew how bad it was. But there's got to be a cure, or something. We can't leave you to…"

"I killed people." There expressions turned like the snap of fingers. "My two best friends, and some gang. I just snapped, and I didn't realize what was happening. But that doesn't justify what I did. I'm still a murderer. I mean, I'm sure you guys will lock me up now, like I was before. Oh, and they tried…they tried to cure me. Probed me, tested me to figure out what is wrong. But they never found out. Neither can you save me. I…"

I felt overwhelmed, and my mouth tensed up like I was going to cry. My voice even cracked when I first said it.

"I'm going to die. I'm going to die and no one can do anything about it."

Then a nature not my own took me over. And I yelled as loud as I could.

"_Malifecent! Come! Come and claim me!_"

"No!" I covered my mouth.

A group of Heartless encircled me. They krept closer and closer, and wrapped themselves around me.

"I don't want to die!" Was my final plee before I was took into the darkness.

I found myself back in the throne room, face to face with Malifecent.

"Did you have a good trip?" She asked.

"_Let's get on with this._" I was too shaken up about the whole thing, and I let her speak through me.

"Ready to be my servant now?"

"_Don't tease me, Malifecent. Remember, I'm not your toy._"

"But you will work for me. You have no choice, you are my Heartless."

I felt a cold rage build up in her. She didn't like that.

"Is that what she really is? A Heartless?" I asked, finding my quivering voice.

"An exceptionally powerful and unique Heartless. I don't believe I will come across anything like you again. And you, pathetic girl, do not get in my way of claiming her again."

She snapped her fingers and two big Heartless appeared.

"Take her to the lab, and no last wishes this time. Don't let her wander."

They took me to a set of double, metal doors that led me two a large metal laboritory. It was full of tubes and glasses, many of them filled with black stuff I supposed was darkness. In front of me was a giant screen with a desk and keyboards on top. To my write were big, glass pods filled with water big enough for a person. On the other side was cabinet filled with test tubes and chemicals, and there was also a metal table in the middle of the room full of junk and alcohol bottles. In front of the screen was a guy in a white coat, like the doctors would wear. He had straight, black hair that almost went to his shoulders. He twirled around in his chair as we entered. He was wearing black glasses, and had tired eyes.

"Oh!" He got up and came up to examine me. "You certainly aren't normal. No, the length of exposure has not been kind to you."

"What's your name?"

"Keo."

"Keo, help me. Please, you must know a way to kill her."

Then my stomack cramped up so terribly that I yelled from the pain.

"Oh, don't do that. Making her angry will only make the process worse."

"I don't care! I'll do anything to keep my life."

"I'm sorry. But Maleficent has me on a short leash. I don't like getting on her bad side."

I tried to fight back, but the pain my Heartless was giving me was unbearable. They had to carry me to the testing table and tied me down. He gave me a gas mask, and stuck a needle into my arm that pumped black stuff into it, and left me there like that. And I was powerless, I could hardly even move. They left and I laid there. Then I felt something on my feet. I looked down and it was Indi; he must have followed me the entire way here.

"You should have stayed." I said, so weakly that I shocked myself. He laid down at my feet.


	8. Chapter 8

I lay there for a long time; I knew it must have been days. Keo came back to check on me every once in a while. I tried to talk to him, but I found out I was losing my voice. Sometimes I managed to mutter something. He didn't say anything to me. I let my thoughts wander as it did when I was in solitude, wondering what it would be like with my Heartless free. I thought of my friends and my brother. Well, if it was the last time I could say their names, "Gio… Marli… Jake." I said their names slowly. Their names felt so sweet on my lips as I uttered them one by one. I never mentioned their names, then it had only brought me pain. I tried to turn my thoughts to a place where they were happy. It wouldn't be so bad if my last thoughts were happy ones of them.

I started fading in and out of consciousness. My thoughts turned empty, but I clung to that memory of them. I could only hold it for a second as I slipped out of consciousness. Sometimes a massive roar woke me up, but one time a voice woke me up.

"I never knew you were like this." It wasn't Keo's voice.

"If I'd have known, I would have come sooner."

I tried to open my eyes but they were heavy. I lifted them once but they imediately closed again.

"We sure are in a pickle this time. I don't know what's going to happen. I'm scared, Hana."

I tried harder this time, I lifted my eyelids again but everything was blurry. All I could tell was that it was someone with a black hood.

"There's so much I want you to know. So much I want to tell you. But I don't know if you'll understand." My eyes dropped to the side, one of his hands had a black glove, and the other didn't. I remembered having a glove.

"Pocket…" I murmured. I could hardly get the words out.

"Huh?" And I said it again, then my eyes closed again, and I started to go out again.

"You still have it!" I looked up and he had put the glove on. I knew him somehow but I couldn't remember. Maybe it was Sora.

"I'm going to take the needle out, and unbuckle your belts." I felt the needle come out, and the belts loosen. Then I felt my head lift and the mask come off.

"Hana, please don't stay here. That stuff is going to kill you. But if you go naturally then you have a chance. You can live, you'll be alright."

Then it hit me like a train. The voice, I had heard it so many times.

"Jake?"

I felt a hand holding mine, I tried to look at his face.

"You're going to be alright."

"Jake…" And I fell unconscious.

I woke up startled. My mind was blank for a while, and then it rushed to me what had happened.

"Jake!"

I slowly lifted myself up, my head ached and my body felt like it weighed a ton. I staggered to my feet, and went out the door.

The Heartless that gaurded me left. Keo was sleeping at the desk, or passed out, there were empty beer bottles lying around the place. I supported myself on the table, and lunged at the door; he never stirred.

In the hallways, I clung to the walls to walk. The pain I had earlier started to swell inside me. The mask must have been a releiver for the pain. I didn't even know where I was going. I just had one thought; it was Jake. He was alive, and he was here. I didn't know how, it was completely impossible, but he was here. It made something else swell up inside me, like my heart was going to burst. I just had to find him and everything would be alright.

I walked through the castle almost bent over from the pain. I stumbled into a large hall; the walls weren't close enough for me to cling to so I had to manage on my own. I noticed there were girls sleeping and locked in vessels. I heard fighting farther into the room. I slowly krept to there, but I could hardly even walk. I knew I wouldn't last long, there was really no point in this. But I finally found that little glimmer of hope I needed so badly. So I couldn't stop.

I climbed the stairs to a platform, where I found Sora and Riku were fighting each other. There was a force field so I couldn't step inside, not like I wanted to. Donald and Goofy were on the other side. I propped myself up and watched the fight. Finally, Sora won. Riku dropped his weapon, and as he fell to the ground he disappeared.

"Riku!" Sora exclaimed as he ran to him.

"Sora! Sora, look!" Donald yelled.

"The… The Keyhole!" Said Goofy.

They were standing up at the top where the portal was. Sora tried to seal it, but could not.

"It won't work! The Keyhole's not finished yet!" Said Goofy.

"What can we do?" Asked Sora.

"Maybe we've gotta go wake Kairi up." Goofy suggested.

"I think you're right. If we can free her heart…" Sora thought. "But… But how?" Sora looked at Riku's Keyblade lying on the ground.

"A Keyblade that unlocks people's heart… I wonder."

Sora walked to the blade.

"Sora?" Goofy asked.

Sora picked up the Keyblade.

"Sora, hold on!" Goofy yelled.

"No, wait!" Yelled Donald too.

He looked back at them, and then piecred his heart with the blade. It drew out a few sparkling bubbles, that flew around the room. Then one came out that floated into Kairi's body. As it did, her eyes opened, and she lived.

Goofy and Donald ran to him.

"Sora!" Kairi exclaimed as she saw her friend falling to the ground. She ran to catch him but he faded away in her arms.

"Sora! Come back, Sora!" Yelled Donald.

They stood there gazing up to were Sora faded away.

"Sora, are you really—No. He can't be! I won't let him go!"

I had watched everything that took place with awe. I got up and stumbled to the platform, but collapsed before I could get to the others, but now they saw me.

"Hana?" Kairi came over and kneeled next to me, she turned me over onto my back.

"Kairi… you're here."

"You're hurt, Hana!" Donald and Goofy ran over too.

"You were gone… but now… you have your heart."

"Can you guys take her?" Goofy nodded.

"Wait! I won't make it."

"You can, you're going to be alright."

I smiled at hearing that again.

"There's light in my heart again, because my brother isn't dead anymore." I paused. "And if Sora could bring you back to life, then… maybe… I can bring my friends back too."

"If you believe, I think there's a way."

"I don't want to die. I want to live."

"Let us take you somewhere safe."

"We can take you back to Traverse Town." Said Donald

I shook my head. "She's strong… she's going to take me, and she will take your hearts. But I won't give up… I won't stop fighting…"

"So, you have awakened at last, Princess." An evil man appeared into the room. Kairi stood up. "The Keyhole is now complete. You have served your purpose. But now it's over."

"Don't make another move!" Said Donald.

"Do you think we can stop him by ourselves?" Goofy whispered to Donald.

"I don't know!"

The man came closer but suddenly haulted. He struggled to move.

"Impossible…"

Riku appeared in front of the man.

"No. You won't use me for this!"

"Riku!" Exclaimed Kairi.

"You've got to run! The Heartless are coming!" Riku replied.

They looked at him and nodded. Then they looked back at me. I nodded to them and they ran.

I tried to get up and saw that Indi was still at my side.

"Indi… you go with them too, okay." He didn't leave. "Go!" and he went unwillingly.

The other Heartless and the man disappeared, to meet them in another place I guessed. Once they were gone, a Heartless appeared. It watched them leave and followed them. And after that I was alone again. But I didn't feel alone anymore. And now that darkness was finally taking over my heart, I could even feel a spark of light there. Tha pain was still there in my heart, but it didn't seem so hard to bear. I didn't last much longer, soon I lost consciousness again, and this time it took my life.

Back in Traverse Town, Sora, Donald, and Goofy walked through the town making their way to the underground water tunnel. Little did they know they were followed by a dark figure, hiding in the shadows on the rooftop. She stayed out of sight, but she was close enough that with a leap she could have them in her grasp. But she knew how strong he was, especially when his friends were with him. It wasn't wise to take him here. She had to separate him from them somehow. Then a man came running from the other side of the alley.

"Hey! You!" He yelled at the boy.

"Huh?"

"You're the Keyblade master, right?"

"Yeah, I am."

"Okay, listen. You're in danger: a lot of danger. You need to stay low for some time."

"What are you talking about? Don't worry I can handle anything that comes my way."

"Not her. No, no. She is stronger than you ever could know, and I think much more than I gave her credit for."

"Who?"

"Did you know the blonde girl?"

She clenched her fists at hearing that. That scientist would be hearing from her soon.

"Hana?"

"Her Heartless has awakened from inside her. And she will be coming after you."

This idiot was giving her away. But she relaxed; the Keyblade master couldn't hide from her.

"So, Hana is…"

"I've seen this happen once before. I used to be a medical nurse, and I treated a young boy who had the same thing she did."

"And he was okay, right?"

"His Heartless took his body, he died. That's how they make themselves stronger than the other Heartless."

"Oh…"

"You need to know the truth. Your friend is gone, so don't show any mercy to her Heartless."

"Thanks for the warning, but I can't go into hiding. I have to seal the Keyhole in Hollow Bastion."

Oh, she thought to herself, the world crawling with Heartless? This will be easy.

She left the world to return to the castle, and there she waited for the Keyblade master to arrive.

Sora and his friends finally arrived back in Hollow Bastion. They discovered that the Beast along with the other princesses were still there, fighting back the darkness. They found the princesses together in a room near the Keyhole.

"We've been waiting for you, Keyblade master." One of them said.

"Where's Ansem?"

"Gone."

"When the Keyhole apeared, darkness poured out of it." Another informed him. "It swallowed Ansem, and he disappeared."

"Though Ansem is gone, the flood of darkness hasn't stopped. We're working together to hold it back."

"I cannot forget the look on his face. As the darkness engulfed him, he was smiling."

"Don't worry." Sora said. "We're here to help."

Then all the lights in the room went out, leaving them in darkness except for a bit of light in the middle. All of them crowded there, frightened.

"You finally made it, Keyblade master." The Heartless slowly clapped, hidden in a place that they couldn't see.

"Huh? Who's there?" Asked Sora. The princesses looked startled.

"So spirited. So eager. It will be such a pleasure taking your heart. And what's more? All the princesses gathered here too? What a glorious feast."

"Show yourself!"

She walked in the darkness, circling them. She was practically invisible. Darkness grew in the tips of her hands, and she threw the strips of darkness onto Goofy. They wrapped him up and in a moment he was tied up and on the ground.

"Goofy!" Yelled Donald.

Sora and Donald took defense, eyeing the place that she had attacked. She was already on the other side. She threw the next one at Donald, and he fell too.

"That's better, don't you think?"

"You're a coward."

"Not at all." She said as she stepped into the light. "Just evening the playing field."

The Heartless girl was the exact image of Hana, except her skin was dark grey, her hair was white, and her eyes completely yellow. She had on black shorts and tank top with a black leather jacket and black boots. Her face was malevolent, and her lips curled into a smile.

"Hana?"

"That girl is gone. No more questions, give me your heart."

And she lunged at him in the blink of an eye with a spear made from the darkness, and Sora dodged it. The princesses backed away, giving them plenty of room.

"Hana! Don't do this!"

"I told you that's not my name!"

They fought on for a few minutes, but Sora didn't let it go.

"Hana, I know you're still there, you are stronger than she is!"

"You know what I'm going to do after I take you? I will take the hearts of these two, and then these girl's hearts. I'm going to eat them."

They kept on, but Sora was having trouble keeping his own. Her strength was unhuman, and she was swift and cunning.

"You were fighting her all that time, Hana. You kept her from hurting people every day. Hana, you are strong enough to overcome her."

"Oh, and who is that girl you are so fond of?"

After she said that she knocked Sora to the ground, and she was on top of him in an instant.

"Kairi, is it? Her heart will make a nice meal." She slowly wrapped her hand around his throat. Sora couldn't move.

"Sora!" Donald yelled.

Then in a moment she was knocked away from Sora. She quickly got up, and looked over. The man in the black hood had kicked her aside; behind him was the boy with black clothes.

"Who the hell are you?" She asked, furiously.

"You're nightmare." And the man attacked her. They were more evenly matched, but the man was proving to be stronger. After a few minutes he had her pinned to the ground.

"I don't understand…you're one of my kind."

"Bring the bag." He said to his companion.

The other ran over, and opened the bag. He pulled out a syringe filled with a purple liquid.

"Sorry…" The boy said as he pushed the needle into her arm.

"What are you doing?" Sora asked, watching what they were doing.

"Saving her." The man answered shortly.

The Heartless girl, who had been fighting and squirming to break free began to relax and had finally lost consciousness. When she did the darkness that was tangled around Sora's friends evaporated and they were free. The hooded man stood and picked her up. He made a tunnel of darkness and stepped inside.

"Come on." And he disappeared. The boy stepped into the tunnel, but before he went he looked back.

"What were your names?" He asked.

"Umm… I'm Sora. This is Donald, and he's Goofy."

The boy nodded and then disappeared into the darkness. He heard Sora shout for him to wait before he left.


	9. Chapter 9

I woke dazzed and confused, with a tingling pain on my arm. I saw above me a bright light, but my surroundings were in darkness. I knew I was lying on a wooden floor. There was also a microphone close to me. I didn't quite feel myself. I felt all different and weird, but it wasn't bad, nor comfortable.

I slowly lifted myself up. I still couldn't see where I was, execpt for the little light from the spotlight shinning above me. I rubbed my arm hoping it would dull the pain. I took my jacket off a little, and was shocked to see a tattoo there; a band in dark brown ink that wrapped around my arm. They were words written in some language I didn't understand, and they circled my arm in four lines.

I stood up. I tried to take a step but the moment I did another spotlight shinned on me from in front. It almost blinded me and I struggled to see.

"Do you remember who you are?" A man's voice asked me.

"Wha…"

"What is your name?" He asked again.

"… Hana." The daze was starting to wear off, and my memories came back to me. They made my heart ache.

"What is the last thing you remember?"

I thought for a while. I remembered I was sick, so sick that I wasn't in control of my body, and that I was getting worse.

"Did I die?"

"More or less. Please, sing, if you will."

Another light appeared and flashed to my side, I looked back to see my old guitar behind me.

"Is that mine?"

"Yes, it is. I saved it for you."

This was strange. Like, stalker strange. But I didn't have too much of a choice. I went to it and kneeled down. I hardly believed it was there, I thought I would never see it again. I touched its glossy panel, to make sure it was real. I took it and went back to the middle.

"What should I play?"

"Think of a song you're friends would want to hear?"

I was shocked, and instantly felt anxious. But I wanted to sing, my heart was bursting out of my chest because it needed to hear a song. So I thought for a moment, and finally came up with a perfect song; one song that was both miserable and full of hope, the song that conjured my feelings together. I started the tune on my guitar, and prepeared to sing.

I am finding out that maybe I was wrong.1

That I've fallen down and I can't do this alone.

Stay with me, this is what I need, please?

My voice rang out through the room. My voice came back to me so naturally. I remembered that I was born to do this.

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you

We could sing our own,

But what would it be without you? Oh-oh.

I am nothing now and it's been so long

Since I've heard the sound, the sound of my only hope.

I wasn't even sad. This was like my victory song.

This time I will be listening. 

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you

We could sing our own,

But what would it be without you? Oh-oh.

This heart, it beats, beats for only you.

This heart, it beats, beats for only you.

This heart, it beats, beats for only you.

My heart is your's

This heart, it beats, beats for only you.

My heart is your's

This heart, it beats, beats for only you.

My heart is your's

This heart, it beats, beats for only you.

My heart, my heart is your's 

My heart is your's

My heart is your's

My heart is

I was calm and I didn't feel miserable like I had the last time I sung. The man interrupted the silence.

"You were swallowed up by your Heartless, and there you lost everything that made you human. But a little bit of you still hung on. And I helped you to come back to life again. But I needed to make sure that it was really you that I revived, and not that the process failed and your Heartless was still in control."

"Is that what this tattoo is?"

"Yes. Those are sacred words that are bonding your Heartless in your heart."

"You mean, she is still inside me? Why didn't you kill her?"

"I cannot take away the darkness in your heart, you would cease to exist without it. That darkness is a part of who you are, don't forget that."

"But I don't like that part of me, she will destroy me."

"Only if you let her, only you are in control of that."

I didn't like the sound of that, but I couldn't deny it.

"Where are we?"

"We are at the end of the worlds. It is a strange place, full of illusions and tricks. Using leftover material from dying worlds, I made this place from echoes in your heart made."

The lights came up, and I saw myself in a tiny concert hall, with rows of audience chairs in front of me. And there, sitting in the middle, was the man in the black hood.

"It's you! You tried to kill me, you stabbed me with a knife!"

"I knew you would not die, you knew it too. Your Heartless was too powerful to let that happen. I simply had to find a way to keep you there next to the door, otherwise you would have never come here."

"I don't understand. Why are you doing all this to me?"

"We don't have time to answer all your questions, you must trust me though."

I staired at him sternly, but submitted.

"Then what's next?"

He stood up and walked to the aisle, and from there he walked up onto the stage where I was.

"Next, we give you back you're hope." He said as he extended his hand.

I hesitated.

"To where?"

"To a place where two worlds are colliding, yours and another."

I didn't really have a choice anyways. I slung the guitar onto my back, and took his hand, and then darkness came up around us and he led me to another place.

Light emerged from the darkness. I came out without my guide or my guitar. I looked around and instantly recognised where I was, and began to shake again.

I found myself on the rooftop of Uncle Anthony's restaurant at sunset. It was the place my friends, my brother, and I would stay at night drinking soda and watching the stars. My best and worst memories came from here.

Anxiously, I turned around to see the ledge we always sat on, and thought of the countless nights we stayed there. I looked out onto the city, the rooftops sloped down and I could see out for miles until they came back up.

"Hana?" My heart stopped. It was her voice.

"Is that you?" And that voice made my heart drop, because it was his voice. I looked back to see my two closest friends side by side. Marli was my first and best friend. She was a tiny, cute girl, with long brown hair. She wore thick black glasses that I remember so well. Gio was my other dear friend, who I could always count on. He was an Italian boy, and he was always so charismatic, but a bit of a ham.

I stepped back without taking my eyes off them.

"Hana, wait." Gio said.

He took a step forward and I snapped. I couldn't face them. I couldn't bare it. I spun around and ran away, even if there was nowhere to run.

"Stop!" Yelled Marli. I stopped right at the edge. I was ready to jump if it was the only means of me escaping from them. I couldn't control my breathing, or my heart from pounding.

"Hana don't jump." She begged.

"We remember everything, Hana." I clentched my fists, I knew what was coming; the questions that I couldn't answer. 'Why did you do this to us?' 'What did we do to deserve this?' How would I respond?

"We aren't mad at you. We don't blame you." Marli said. I thought I was hearing things for a moment. "You weren't yourself. Something else was inside you."

I loosened up. I still didn't move, I didn't know what to make of all of this.

"I was—I mean…I couldn't do anything. I didn't know what happened… until it was over."

"I know." Marli's comforting words pierced my heart like a knife and it ached.

I slowly began to turn around. "No. You can't…"

"Hana," Gio interrupted, "please, let us help you. What's done is done. You have to move on, like we have."

I couldn't say anything. My heart was in my throat.

"You're going to get better." Marli said.

A sensation came over me like nothing I ever felt before. Tears swelled up into my eyes and huge drops rolled down my cheeks. I fell to my knees, sobbig uncontrollably.

"Sorry…" I muttered.

Marli ran to me and wrapped me in her arms.

"It's okay, everything is going to be alright now."

I couldn't stop crying. Gio knelt down behind me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Marli, Gio, I'm so sorry… so sorry."

I don't know how long we were there, but it didn't seem to matter. I was so happy, and I also wasn't. I didn't really know how I felt, but I knew I was in the place I needed to be.

Meanwhile, Sora, Donald, and Goofy had been exploring the end of the worlds, searching for a way to put an end to the Heartless and Ansem. There they found portals that took them to the remains of destroyed worlds. Through one portal they heard a little sobbing sound, along with a boy singing.

Don't worry about a thing,2  
'Cause every little thing  
Gonna be all right.

They came to the ruins of an old church. At the end where there should have been a pulpit grew hundreds of white lilies, and the rays of the sun shown on them. Against one stone among the flowers sat Hana, crying in her sleep. Next to her sat the boy with the black hood, singing softly. The three walked closer, up to the flowers. The boy noticed and stopped singing. He got up and walked to them.

"Sora."

Sora looked over at Hana. "Is that Hana? Why is she crying?"

The boy looked back at her.

"I don't really know." He paused. "I have to go now. She can't see me. But, Sora, can you do me a favor?"

"What is it?"

"Look after my sister, would ya? She always has a knack for getting herself into trouble. And now she's… well you know. I don't know how much more heartbreak she can take, and I can't take care of her myself."

"Wait, does that mean you're Jake?"

The boy, looking at his sister, didn't answer. Then pulled his hood down and looked at them. He had the same eyes as his sister, with hair just a bit darker than hers.

"Do you promise?"

Sora nodded. "I will look out for her."

"Thank you." Jake said as he put his hood back on. He walked down the aisle out of the church, whistling the song he was singing.

"Hana. Hana?" I felt someone nudging my shoulder.

"Sora?" I looked up and they were looking at me with worried faces.

"What's going on?"

"Hana, you're crying…"

I touched my face, and it was wet. Then I remembered why I was crying. With much struggle I held back another outburst.

"Are you okay?"

"Just… a minute."

They gave me some space, and it took me a few minutes to compose myself. I stood up, trying to dry my face.

"I haven't cried for months." I felt my heart and I could feel a beat.

Joy rushed over me like a flood.

"I'm… I'm alive. I'm really alive!" I held my head. "I'm here and I'm so alive. There is light and everything is lovely again!" I twirled about like a little girl. I must've looked ridiculous but I couldn't help it because finally after the long year of pain and suffering there was finally hope in my life.

"The light is back. There is hope again!" I whirled around to see Sora, Donald, and Goofy looking very confused at me. Then I felt embarrassed.

"Oh, you guys, about before…"

"Don't mention it." Sora interrupted. The others nodded.

"You guys are so kind. I really don't deserve it. Even now that you know about my past."

"Well… we were just trying to help."

"And you helped me, Sora." I said as I glided up to him.

"Me? But how?"

"You brought Kairi back to life. And well, who knows? Maybe I can bring mine back to life too! My brother is already here. My brother is alive, I don't believe it!"

I took a deep breath, enjoying it. I felt reborn.

"But Hana, you know what I had to do to bring her back? I might not have come back, and you might not either!"

"So what? This life isn't worth living if they aren't here. I can't bare this burden forever. So now my life is dedicated to bringing them back! No matter the cost!"

He smiled. "I didn't know you were like this, Hana."

"Like what?"

"Happy."

I felt embarrased all of a sudden.

"Well… I don't know…"

"You'll find you're friends, Hana." Said Goofy. "I'm sure of it!"

"Yeah!" Donald agreed. "And we will be here to help you."

"Oh. Umm… okay."

"What's the matter?"

"It's just… been a while since I felt this way."

He smiled. "It's been a while since you've had friends."

That word hit me like a train. Since what happened to mine, I couldn't have friends, because I was so afraid of people finding out what I was, and that I might hurt them. But now, I was in control again. And it would be nice to rely on others.

"And, are you guys my friends?"

"Yeah!" Sora said as the other two nodded.

I smiled, one of the most genuine smiles I had in a while.

"Alright then, friends it is."

"Hey, don't start crying again!" I dried my face with my sleeve again.

"Sorry."

"Let's get going?"

"Yeah!" We started to leave, and on the side of a pillar I saw Indi with my guitar and backpack. I ran over and hugged him.

"You poor thing! I've treated you terribly, haven't I? Well things are going to be different from now on." I held him up and I saw his eyes shinning like he was smiling. "You're sticking with me, always!" I picked up my backpack and put him inside. I slung it on my shoulder and put the guitar on the other.

"Is that yours?" Goofy asked.

"Mmhmm. This has been mine for years."

"I'd like to hear you play sometime!" Said Sora.

"Maybe you will. For now let's get out of here."

And we finally left.

After hours upon hours of fighting Heartless, well I mostly stayed on the sideline and let them do their thing, we finally came to a big wooden door. Once we got there, Sora stopped.

"Huh?"

"What's wrong?" Asked Donald.

"Don't you hear something? There!"

We listened but there was only silence.

"I didn't hear anything!"

"Strange… That voice was so familiar. Maybe it's just my imagination."

"Maybe you'd better take a rest!"

"Nah, I'm alright."

As he said it he opened the door. Beams of light flooded into the dark room. I couldn't look directly into it. In a moment everything was covered in light. Then I smelled the ocean air, and saw that we were standing on the beach of the Destiny Islands.

"Is this… Is this my island?" Sora asked.

"I think it is." I replied.

We walked down the beach, and then Sora led us to where the waterfall was, where next to it was a dark hole.

"This world has been connected." A man said.

Parts of the island started disapearing.

"What was that?" Asked Goofy.

"Tied to the darkness… soon to be completely eclipsed. There is so very much to learn. You understand so little…"

The sea turned black and the world started to shake.

"A meaningless effort. One who knows nothing can understand nothing."

In a second the entire island was in ruins, surrounded by darkness. On the edge we saw Riku standing, looking out into the sea. Sora ran out to meet him.

"Take a look at this tiny place. To the heart seeking freedom this island is a prison surrounded by water. And so this boy sought to escape from his prison. He sought a way to cross over into other worlds. And he opened his heart to darkness."

As he turned around he turned into the man speaking through Riku, into Ansem.

"Riku!" Sora yelled.

"Don't bother. Your voice can no longer reach him where he is. His heart belongs again to darkness. All worlds begin in darkness, and all so end. The heart is no different. Darkness sprouts within it, grows, consumes it. Such is its nature. In the end, every heart returns to the darkness whence it came."

In an instant he appeared behind us and we jumped back.

"You see, darkness is the heart's true essence."

"That's not true! The heart may be weak. And sometimes it may even give in. But I've learned that deep down, there's a light that never goes out!"

Ansem floated up into the air.

"So, you have come this far and still you understand nothing. Every light must fade, every heart return to darkness!"

A monster appeared behind him, and he came at us. Sora, Donald, and Goofy fought with him. Ansem was very quick and strong, but with the three working together, they began to win against him. I, again, stood to the side, but this time with the knife that Leon gave me pulled out, ready to step in if I had too. It was a furious onslaught from Sora and his friends, and they dealt a good deal of damage on Ansem.

Ansem retreated, and we followed. Than the huge tree that stood next to the beach began to move. To be more exact, it cracked open in half pushing everything else aside. In the middle of the dark crater was Ansem. Sora followed him, but a force field formed around the crater and we couldn't get in. Then a giant monster emerged from inside the crater, and Sora was trapped inside to fight it. We watched as he fought the creature. The monster was strong, and had many Heartless to help, but soon Sora won. Ansem appeared again, and they fought. They were evenly matched, but in the end Sora won again.

Then everything fell to darkness. I had no idea where I was. Every second or so I would catch a glimpse of my companions.

"Wha…" I heard Sora say.

"Behold the endless abyss! Within it lies the heart of all worlds: Kingdom Hearts!"

In the distance we saw a white door.

"Look as hard as you are able. You'll not find even the smallest glimmer of light. From those dark depths are hearts born. Even yours."

Then we found ourselves floating in a forest of darkness, or not a forest but a giant monster.

"Darkness conquers all worlds!"

We fell, and Donald, Goofy, and me got sucked into the darkness again. I don't know how much time I spent there, but all of a sudden I was in a dark room with the three of them fighting Heartless. Some of them attacked me, and I flung my knife at them. Then they hit some gem looking thing and were able to fly away, from which the head of the monster exploded.

Of course by this point I was completely lost and confused, especially the bit about flying. I focused on not dropping my guitar and bag.

The explosion left the capsule exposed ontop of the monster, and they went to take it out, from which it exploded. Ansem came back, and the guys fought him. After a long fight, they won the battle.

The entire monster exploded, and Ansem, attatched to it, bursted into light and caused a massive explosion.

Unfortunately, he was still there with us. We found ourselves at Kingdom Hearts.

"It is frutile. The Keyblade alone cannot seal the door to darkness. Kingdom Hearts! Fill me with the power of darkness…"

The white doors opened, and darkness came oozing out of it.

"Supreme darkness…"

"You're wrong. I know now, without a doubt. Kingdom Hearts… is light!"

The darkness turned into rays of light, and blasted into Ansem's face. He squinted from it. He disappeared into the light, and that's the last we ever saw him.

We landed on the ground and ran to the door. Sora pushed it.

"Come on!"

We tried to close the doors but they wouldn't budge. Goofy looked inside and gasped.

"Stop staring and keep pushing!" Yelled Donald. Then he looked inside and gasped too. We all looked inside. A mountain of Heartless lay inside.

"The Heartless!?"

"Hurry!" Donald yelled frantically.

"I can't…" murmured Sora. He was right, the doors didn't move at all.

"Don't give up!" A hand appeared from inside out and helped us close it. It was Riku. "Come on, Sora! Together we can do it!"

"Okay!" Sora replied.

The doors still didn't budge.

"It's hopeless!" Screamed Donald.

We heard some explosions. Then looking inside, Donald and Goofy's faces lit up. I looked again.

"Your Majesty!"

A mouse jumped up from amidst the Heartless.

"Now, Sora! Let's close this door for good!"

"Close it, quick!" Said Donald.

"But…" Started Sora.

"Don't worry. There will always be a door to the light."

"Sora, you can trust King Mickey." Goofy said.

"Now, they're coming." Riku exclaimed.

"Donald, Goofy, thank you." King Mickey said looking back.

We pushed with everything we had, and finally the door budged.

"Take care of her." Riku asked of Sora before the doors closed.

I saw Sora nod. And we finally closed it. Then Sora leaped back, and locked the door with the Keyblade. And as he did the door bursted into light, and disappeared.

I was standing to the side as we watched it go. We all looked at each other and smiled. Suddenly I realized my bag was lighter. Indi had wandered off, and I looked around and saw him at the edge.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I ran over. He looked back at me and before I was in reach he jumped off.

"Hey!" I screamed, and without thinking I reached out over the edge and caught him, but I was over too much and lost my balance. I fell, but managed to catch a ridge a little ways down.

"Hana!" The others yelled as they ran for me. I held on as hard as I could with my one hand. I looked down, and saw nothing but darkness.

"Hana, give me your hand!" Sora yelled, reaching out to me.

Putting Indi on my shoulder, I reached up, but I couldn't reach and almost fell trying.

"Just stay there we will get you back up. Hold my feet, Donald."

It wasn't worth risking their lives to save me.

"Sora, wait."

"No, Hana!"

"It's just… I'm not afraid of the darkness, Sora. So… don't worry about me. I always make it out of these sticky situations. And besides, maybe falling into this abyss…"

I didn't finish my sentence because Indi jumped. I watched him go down, and then I looked back up at Sora and shrugged. Then I let go, and fell once again into darkness.

"Hana!" His voice rapidly faded away.

It wasn't so bad as I had thought, falling into darkness. I guess I had to look out for the landing though. But still, I felt more alive than ever. I felt the love of my friends and my brother in my heart, and with them there I didn't feel so lonely. I had the strength to push on and keep going. I just had this feeling that I would be alright, because I had to stay alive for them.

And so I fell, and I fell. For an infinite amount of time that I cannot recount. Waiting to land so that I could start my new journey.

1 My Heart by Paramore

2 Three Little Birds by Bob Marley


	10. Chapter 10

"Who is that?" A man in a black cloak remarked.

"How did she get in here?" A girl also dressed in black asked. "We have to get her out."

"She doesn't look like trouble."

"She could interfere, we can't blow this operation. Think how much trouble we would be in with the boss."

"I can handle him."

"Let's give her to Namine. We can use her for the Organization."

"What use would she be?"

"Well she must be special, otherwise she wouldn't be here."

"True." The man looked down and thought for a moment. "I'll get her."

I dreamt I was lying on a beach. I couldn't see it; I was only looking up at the blue sky, shining sun, and passing seagulls. I heard the waves and felt the splash of them in front of me. There were hands holding my own, and I wanted to know who was beside me. But I couldn't make myself look. I slowly realized how still I was, and how still my surroundings were. I stirred as I slowly realized I wasn't falling through darkness anymore. I opened my eyes and saw Indi looking over me. My backpack and guitar were at each side of me in my hands. I sat up dreamly and looked around. It was a room like in a castle, with pillars and a short stairway leading up to a big double door. What was funny about the room was that everything was white. I quickly snapped out of my trance and became ecstatic.

"We aren't dead!"

I picked Indi up and spun around with him.

"Ha! Can you believe it? Hey, wait…" I stopped and stared hard at him. "It's your fault that we fell in the first place, what were you doing?"

He stared up at me with big, bright eyes.

"You're going to be trouble. Well, from now on you aren't allowed to run off. Got that?"

He squinted his eyes like he was smiling. Well, it was something. I put him down.

"Alright, let's find out where we are." I picked up my guitar and backpack. "Let's head that way." I walked up the stairs and tried the door but it was locked.

"Not that way." I looked back and there was another door. I walked over to open it, but it wouldn't budge either. I stepped back for a while and stared at both the doors, thinking out my escape. I came to a conclusion: there was none.

"How do I get out of here!" I screamed furiously.

I didn't like the thought of being trapped. I didn't like the thought of not knowing where I was. Then another thought crossed my mind. What if I really was dead? A white room with no way out, maybe it was my little room of hell. Woah, spending eternity here…

"We aren't dead. Indi, please tell me we aren't dead."

I looked down at him as he stared blankly at me.

"I'm talking with a Heartless. I'm going crazy again."

I regreted what I said immediately. I shouldn't joke about… that time. I stood there thoughtlessly for a short time. Then I put my backpack and guitar down, ran up the stairs and tried to bust through the door. I tried kicking it down, but nothing happened. I slumped down the door and sat against it, staring into the room. I would just have to wait for something to happen. I heard a raking noise. I looked down and saw Indi holding the strap of my guitar, trying to drag it up the stairs. I reached out to grab it and placed it on my lap. Indi sat next to me.

"You wanna hear a song, do ya?"

I stroked the strings with my fingers, and tuned a couple cords. Even if it was hell, I at least had company. I wasn't alone this time.

"Well, alright."

I couldn't find a song to sing. I spent so many years practicing and singing, and now it was like they were all gone. It was because my heart was silent, probably exhausted. I thought and I thought as I stroked the strings, finding the right words for the tune.

Meanwhile, Riku had been wandering through Castle Oblivion. He had been traveling alone for quite a long time now. He would wish that he had some company every once in a while, but it was useless. And so, he was fighting his way through the Heartless in a memory room of the castle, when suddenly he heard a faint voice accompanied by a guitar coming from the streets.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night1

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

Riku walked through the street, trying to find the voice. And still it echoed all around him.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to be free.

It seemed as if the voice came from all around him, he searched for its source, eager to find the singer, with the thought of having company with him.

Blackbird fly, blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.  
Blackbird fly, blackbird fly

Into the light of the dark black night.

Finally, he found the door to leave the memory room. He put his ear up against it and listened.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

You were only waiting for this –

Hana stopped at the intrusion. She quickly stood up and put her instrument aside, and Indi sat up as well.

"And who are you supposed to be?"

In front of her appeared a man in a black coat.

"How did you get here?" He asked.

"Answer my question first!"

"Hmm, I was going to give you a chance. I can gather the information I need from your heart anyway."

As he spoke he pulled down his hood. He was a funny looking guy, with flaming red hair, bright green eyes, and two black marks on his cheeks.

"I'd like to see you try." I braced myself for an attack.

"A tough one, aren't you? We could use a spirited girl like you."

"What for?"

"Tisk tisk. You don't need to know that. Well come with me then."

"Like hell!" I jumped on him and through a punch, but he caught my wrist with little effort. I struggled to break free, but it was useless. I was too weak to defend myself.

"Are you going to come peacefully or will I have to force you?"

With my free hand I threw another punch, he caught it and threw me at one of the pillars. I lost my breath and fell to the ground choking. I looked up to see him over me. He took the collar of my shirt and lifted me up.

"Now then, ready to give up."

"No…" I pushed away and he let go. I ran to the door and tried to open it, but it was no use. I was still trapped. Then he grabbed my arm and flung me back. I landed near my backpack, and I opened a pocket to grab my knife. I attacked but he was too quick, he grabbed me and threw me face first into the door. He knocked me out, and from there I have no idea what happened next.

Many things happened in the following week, much of which I wasn't aware, because I was put into a sort of cell. Not a cell really. It was an egg, but you will learn more of that later. I couldn't tell where I was, I only saw darkness. A girl's voice pierced the silence of the darkness and told me she would help me. She told me to open my heart and reveal my memories. But I couldn't. I feared my memories, and what she had planned for them. In the past year I became better at controlling my thoughts, and so I kept them blank, or on things at present. And I stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity, waiting to be free from the darkness.

Much later I was told what happened during this time by King Mickey, which I will relate now. While I was in the castle, called Castle Oblivion, the King, Riku, Sora, Goofy, and Donald were also there. The man I ran into was a part of Organization XIII. They were experimenting on Sora and Riku, to use them for the Organization. They tore apart Sora's memories and replaced them with false ones to turn him against others, and they made an exact copy of Riku to use as a puppet. In the end, the copy was destroyed, and Sora was placed in an egg like mine in order to restore his true memories. And Riku, who chose not to sleep, worked in order to restore his friend's memories. It was while he was visiting Sora that he discovered where I was.

As he left Sora, my little Heartless came out from the shadows. Riku recognized him. The Heartless ran down the hall, and Riku followed. The Heartless went to a door and scratched at it, wanting inside. Riku opened the door and went in too. There was me in my little egg, it was transparent so he could see me sitting inside, and starring into space without moving. He called out to me.

"Riku?"

He stared at me curiously, because I spoke without moving my lips.

"Where are you?" I asked.

"I'm here in front of you."

"But I can't see you."

Now he looked around the room, and looking above me he saw my heart inside a bubble that was covered with wires.

"Where am I?"

"Oh, Hana…"

"Where am I?" I asked again, feeling that something was wrong.

"Listen, you're going to be okay…"

"What happened to me?"

"You're heart isn't inside your body, its above you hooked to wires."

I processed this for a moment.

"I knew that something was wrong. I'm okay."

"How… did you get like this?"

"I don't know. I was in a white room, and a man in a hood attacked me. He knocked me out, and that's the last thing I remember, besides a girl talking to me."

"What girl?"

"I was already like this, I didn't recognize her voice."

"It must have been Namine…"

"Who?"

"What did the girl tell you?"

"She… she said I have to remember my memories."

"Have you?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I'm afraid of what she will do with them… and I'm afraid to remember them."

"Why are you afraid to remember them?"

"It's just… they're painful memories. Would you want to remember everything you've done—"

I stopped abruptly, realizing how insulting that was in light of recent events.

"Sorry, I didn't mean it like that. But you understand what I'm saying. Especially if someone is watching, I don't want them to see what I am."

"But maybe it will help you, if you share them. Others can relate and comfort you."

"I seriously doubt that anyone can relate to what I've done."

"Try me."

"Even you can't."

"You really think so?"

"Yeah…"

There was another silence.

"Then what are you going to do, just stay like this forever?"

"No! I can't. Or, I don't know…" I paused, remembering that Riku had the Keyblade that Sora used, "you can take your Keyblade and pierce it through my heart."

"What!? Why would you say something like that?"

"Well, I saw what Sora did to bring Kairi back to life, because Kairi was in his heart, and it was with your Keyblade, right?"

"Yeah…"

"My friends are in my heart too, exactly like Sora and Kairi. So if I pierce it with your Keyblade then they will live again."

"Huh? Wait… I don't think it works like that."

"I'm going to find a way, whether you help me or not."

"I won't let you! It's suicide."

"What else do I have to look forward to? Even if I do return to my body, how do I go on living without them?"

There was another silence as Riku thought.

"I'm going to talk with Namine."

"Wait! Don't leave me!"

"I'm going to come back. Don't worry, your Heartless will stay here with you."

"Okay… come back soon."

I don't know how much time went by, but it seemed like days.

"I'm back."

"Took you long enough."

"It was only a few hours."

"More like an eternity. Have you reconsidered?"

"No."

"You're cruel."

"I'm trying to help you."

"Whatever. So what did Namine say?"

He took a deep breath, kind of like the ones Leon gave me when I was irritating. "Well, Namine was being used by the Organization. They told her to remove your heart, so that they could use you as a puppet…"

"They did what!? They couldn't, I would have known."

"No, you wouldn't. You're heart isn't connected with your body."

"I…bu…"

"Calm down. They didn't do anything to you. They were in the process of making a new heart for you when the operation was shut down."

"Okay, so why does she want my memories."

"She said it's the best chance of connecting your heart with your body. Because you will feel human again by experiencing the emotions from your memories."

"So I have to think of all of them?"

"She said the strongest ones, those that will provoke emotion."

"I see… Riku?"

"Hmm?"

"I don't think I can. It's like I lose myself when I think about back then."

"You don't want to feel the pain, I get it. But you have to. Do it for them."

"For them… I just have to remember… alright."

"Do you want me here with you?"

"No, not at all. But I don't want to be alone either. Why would you want to stay anyway?"

"Like I said, I could help. Besides, I know what its like to feel alone."

"Fine, stay with me, and I'll tell you if I want you to go."

"Alright."

"I'll start with something small. Okay, here we go!"

1 Blackbird by The Beatles


	11. Chapter 11

I thought back to a friendly place: the park that I spent my early years at. My mom and dad took me there almost every day, and when mom had my brother, it became my dad who took me. I hardly remember my mother going there with me. I took a moment to picture it all, the swings, the sandbox, the merry-go-round, the big, wooden castle with slides and monkey bars. It was fall, the most beautiful time of the year. The few leaves in the trees were red and yellow, and hundreds of them layed on the ground. I visioned myself, only six years old with short blonde hair and dirty overalls. I had cuts and bruises all over my arms and hands. I was scooping the leaves up and making big piles to jump in.

"Hey, is that you?"

I shrieked out in astonishment at finding Riku standing next to me.

"Wha—how… how did you get here? Isn't this my mind?"

"Namine said something about this, that your heart was hooked up to a computer so the Organization could tell what you were thinking and experience it all first hand. It's very similar to the technology from the castle."

"They sure were creeps, weren't they? Couldn't you have told me that earlier?"

"Well, you said you wanted me here."

"Right…" I wondered if he was really there with me. I quickly poked him in the side.

"Ow…"

"You really are here!" I beamed up at him. Then I felt something crawling up my back. I looked to find Indi on my shoulder.

"Good! You're here too. It's like we're here in person, really talking."

"I've never seen you so happy." Riku looked happy to see me acting normal. "Were you always like this inside your mind?"

"No, at least, not when you knew me. But I'm turning over a new leaf!"

I felt the irony of what I said, since it was fall. Like the old me was dying to make way for change.

"Anyway," Riku continued. "This is where you grew up?"

"Yup! Over there is my dad." I pointed to a man who was in his thirties. He still had his youthful strength, but was noticibly growing old and stiff. He wore glasses, and also a blue military outfit.

"My dad worked for the government, right now he was stationed in the town we lived in, and he took me here all the time."

We turned back to me, as I jumped into the leaves. The park was packed with kids, but none of them bothered me.

"You aren't playing with the other kids?"

"No, I was kind of a loner. In school people always thought I was a delinquent because I was so rough and hot tempered. I got into fights a lot too, and people knew me by my record."

"Really? I never would have thought it."

"Well, I was quite different back then. But on this day all that changed. Let me show you."

This was the day that I met my best friend, Marli. I pointed to another little girl my age and her mom walking down the sidewalk. She wore a purple skirt with a white shirt and blue jean jacket. She also wore colorful striped tights and pink boots. She had long, straight dark brown hair pulled into two ponytails, blue eyes, and little purple glasses. She left her mom and skipped to the sand box. But never got there, because three boys from the jungle gym went to her once she was far enough from her mom.

"Hey four eyes!" One of them yelled. He was a big brute, and a year older which made a big difference when you are still a kid. "Give me your glasses."

She stopped and backed away without saying a word, gripping onto her glasses.

"Didn't you hear me? Let me see." He commanded.

"We just want to try them out." Another wimpier one said.

"But… I can't see without them."

"We won't do nothing to them." The big one smirked.

She started to take them off then he snatched them from her. He forced them on, bending them outward to make them fit his big head.

"These are busted, I can't see anything out of them. It's all blurry!"

By this time six-year-old me was silently watching the commotion going on, with little interest though. I remember thinking I should stop it before something bad happened, but I didn't like getting into unnecessary trouble. I didn't want dad mad at me. Besides, I knew the boy; he lost interest in things like this or his mom would stop him eventually.

"I can see with them." The girl said, squinting.

"You'd see better without them. Come on, let's play." He said, not to her but to his friends.

"Wait! I need them back."

The boys circled her and threw the glasses to each other above her head. She watched helplessly, and started to cry. Now my attention was grabbed. As much as I didn't like getting into anyone's business, I hated bullying more. I got up and made my way there. They never even noticed me. Then the boy's hand slipped and dropped her glasses on the sidewalk and cracked one lense.

"Hey!"

They all turned to me.

"What you want, boy?" They liked calling me that because I looked and acted like a boy.

"Why don't you go torture some other helpless creature." I said.

"You looking for trouble?"

"Don't you try it. I'll be sending you crying to your mommy."

When you are at this age, you never tell that to someone unless you want to fight.

"We'll see whose crying." He said and threw a punch right at my face. He hit my left eye and sent me to the ground. They stood there and laughed. It was a dirty punch, it throbbed and I knew it would be black. But I made no sound, suppressing any grunt or sob. Once I got my sense back, I slowly got up.

They stopped laughing and watched me in awe and fear. Because when you get punched like that you always start crying and wailing, and they couldn't believe I was getting up like I'd just tripped. Once on my feet, I pounced on the seven-year-old. I returned the punch and kicked and fought until he was down. It took no time at all to get the other two down. They were all crying, and I heard one scream 'mommy' which made me smile because I'd kept my promise.

When the fight was over I looked at the girl who was looking at me wide eyed. She was scared of me. I walked over to her glasses, picked them up for her, and gave them back.

"Thanks." She said, hesitantly.

I shrugged, avoiding eye contact.

"You aren't going to hurt me are you?"

I shook my head, a little hurt. We were silent but not for long because the moms and dads came running to us. The parents of the boys took their kids in their arms, and the kids started screaming out things about me. The girl's mom kneeled down to her and asked if she was all right, and said she could buy her new glasses. My dad took me by the shoulder and gave me that look I always got when I was fighting. I was in for it when I got home. Then the parents of the boys got mad at my dad, even the mom of the girl was mad at him. They yelled about how I was beeing raised and things like that. I wasn't upset, it was normal. I found myself backed away from the group with the girl next to me.

"You want to get some icecream?" I asked.

"We can't. Not with them talking about us like that. We'd get in trouble." She said. I remember how funny she looked with her broken glasses. They slumped down her nose, and one eye looked split in two.

"Why not? They won't notice. The icecream truck is just over there, and dad gave me money to buy my own today." I pulled it out of my pocket to show her. She also pulled out some money. We looked at each other in silent agreement, and then walked to the truck, side by side.

"Does your face hurt?"

"A little."

"It's not pretty with that black eye."

"Neither is yours with those glasses."

She giggled and I did too.

"I'm Marli."

"Hana."

"And that was how we met." I told Riku, as the little girls walked away. "I can't believe I'm seeing it again like it is really happening."

"What happened next?"

"We didn't go to the same school, but I went to her house at least once a week. It was all I looked forward to. Marli's mom, Mrs. Gardener, never liked me. She thought I was a bad influence on her daughter. But for a while she tolerated me being in there as long as I stayed outside her house. Marli taught me how to be a girl, like how to make a tea party and be a princess. I didn't mind, but I'd rather have been playing in the mud probably. Some days she brought out a book to read with me, or a magazine to show me some cute celebrity she was going to marry. Eventually, we had sleepovers. My parents talked to hers and convinced that woman to let me inside. I showed her Broadway shows and musicals, and we'd listen to my CDs. She became my only friend. I was completely devoted to her. I was even jealous, because she was always so cute. So I asked my mom to buy me a skirt and girly things, and I started growing my hair out to look like a girl."

As I spoke we watched the girls buy their icecream. I stopped as I watched them walking on the sidewalk.

"How do you feel?" Riku asked.

"Happy, but it's a happiness I have grown bitter of. It makes me sad too. Do you ever feel like that?"

"When I think back to the island. I don't think I should have left."

"Do you really?"

He nodded. "I would never have fallen to darkness; to become such a monster."

"Hmm… but now you're so much stronger for defeating the darkness inside you. It's made you appreciate things better. And you've become a better person, don't you think?"

He was silent.

"So let's go to the next memory?"

"Alright."

I reflected on my memories, and decided to skip ahead to the night I met Gio. I opened my eyes to see the living room of the house I spent my childhood in. In front of us was me, a little older with my hair at my shoulders, playing the piano.

"You can play the piano?" Riku asked.

"Yup, and other instruments too! You've never seen my guitar, have you?"

"I saw one in the hallway, come to think of it."

"Oh good, so I haven't lost it. That has been my favorite guitar for years. Well, mom wanted me to be more refined, so she made me learn to play the piano. It was thrilling; it's like feeling my heart in my fingers, and playing to its beat. I was born to play music, and sing too."

The little me finished playing, I informed Riku that I had just played it succesfully hitting every key for the first time. I was so excited that I wanted to tell my parents. I got up and ran but as I did I heard my parents arguing. I went to the door and watched. Moment by moment, it got worse and they began screaming at each other. Finally, my mom yelled that 'it was over between us' and I ran up to my room in tears. I buried my face in the pillows on my bed and cried. After a few minutes, my brother, Jake, came in.

"Hana?"

I didn't say anything. He was too young to understand, and he wasn't worried but curious.

"Hana? What's going on?"

"Go away!" I yelled, muffled in the pillows.

He stood there watching me, and then summoned the courage to ask again.

"Why are mom and dad yelling?"

"Shut up!"

"What's wrong?"

By now I couldn't stand it any longer, especially with hearing the screams coming from the kitchen. I pushed him away and jumped down the window. We watched as I grabbed my bike and sped off down the road.

"And there I go."

"Is this hard for you to remember?"

I shook my head. "My parents will divorce. Dad goes up state for his work, and mom stayed here. We go stay with him in the summer, and with mom during the school year. I joined a ballet school when I was with dad, and sang and played piano in the school choir for school."

"Wasn't it hard on you two?"

"I suppose in the beginning it was. But my life wasn't so bad."

I closed my eyes and took us to the corner where an Italian restaurant was. To the left, I sped down the road, and, trying to wipe my eyes, ran into a lamppost and tumbled to the ground.

"I was lost and ended up here on accident, but now I think it was fate."

I sat up on the curb and rubbed my bleeding hands. I looked at my bike. The front wheel had completely broken off, and it was a wonder that I didn't hit my head on the lamp. I buried my hand in my lap and cried. I was unaware of the boy that came outside from the restaurant. It was Gio. He was a tall, slender olive skinned boy with short black hair and brown eyes.

"Woah. Are you okay?"

I didn't answer.

"Hey, you're the girl from school that's always in trouble with the teachers."

I still didn't answer.

"You hurt?"

"Go away!"

"Geez, fine, have it your way." And the boy went back inside. Almost at the same moment a man came out ringing the boy by his collar.

"You can't just leave a hurt girl sitting on the street! Invite her inside!" The man demanded.

"But she didn't want to!" The boy yelled back.

"Mind your elders, boy!"

The man was Uncle Anthony. He was an old man in his mid-fifties. He was half bald and had a big stomach, but he also had one of the most warming smiles I had ever known. He was always cheery, and always knew the right thing to say. Of course, he wasn't my real uncle, but we spent so much time there that we could call him that. He became my second family.

Putting on a completely different air, Uncle Anthony went up to the crying me and kneeled down.

"Little girl, I'm sorry for my nephew's rudeness." I turned around and looked up. "What's your name?"

"Hana." I sniffled.

"What a beautiful name. Mine is Anthony, and this piece of bologne is Giovanni."

I giggled.

"Hey!" Gio yelled.

"Hana, why don't you come inside?" He helped me up and I followed him in. We watched as he sat me down at a table with Gio on the other side. He went to get me a soda.

"They are going to take me and my bike home," I said, thinking it would be easier to just tell the rest, "where my parents are frantically searching the streets for me. The next day, I walked back to the restaurant to thank them. Uncle Anthony was busy, so I stayed with Gio until I could speak with his uncle. He had a crush on Katie Fisher, a pretty, popular girl who I hated. We argued about her. Gio tried to tell me how she was an angel and I tried to tell him she was a demon. We sat in silence until I talked with his uncle and left. I started to notice him at school. He never talked to anyone. I sat with him at lunch one day. I don't even remember what we talked about, but it was nothing important. I took Jake and Marli to the restaurant one day. Jake liked him a lot, and Marli thought he was weird. Me and Gio didn't have anything in common, but we came to like each other's company, you know? Marli was the same, but it took her even longer to get used to him. We started spending more and more time until he became a part of our little clan."

As I spoke the restaurant skipped days and weeks relating what I was saying. At this point I watched all of us together laughing and drinking sodas together. For a moment I forgot everything, and just remembered that time when all was right.

"Um, Hana?"

I snapped out of it.

"Oh, sorry. I was just watching. So, we would all go to parks together. Some weekends we went to the museum or to the candy store. Once I got into a fight, and my face was pretty banged up. Mrs. Gardner saw it, and told me I couldn't see her daughter anymore. I was upset, but not for long, because we would meet up at the restaurant together. We spent a lot of time there. Once we stayed until night and Gio took us to the roof. You can see some stars there, even with the city lights. That roof became our place, we spent several nights there."

I paused and took us to the roof at night, and we watched them sitting on the edge of the building.

"I would give anything to be back here again. It was my favorite place."

I thought of the things we talked about and the games we played, I thought of how we slowly fell asleep in blankets we brought with us.

"Why don't you?"

"Ugh, a lot of bad things happened here."

I slowly remembered the thing that tore all this apart. Realizing that Riku was here watching, I frantically tried to stop my thoughts. I must have made some noise or did something, because I heard Riku ask if I was okay. I let my thoughts turn blank, and slowly everything turned black, and I was blinded in darkness once again.

"Hana? Are you there?"

"I'm here."

"Don't scare me like that! I kept calling but you wouldn't say anything, I thought you might be gone. What happened?"

"I started to remember things I didn't want you to see."

"Do you want me to leave?"

"No… but you can't stay."

"Make up your mind."

"I don't know."

He sighed.

"Look, I should get back to work. Take a break, and consider if you want me here. I'll be back soon."

"Okay." I said after some consideration, and he left.


	12. Chapter 12

I was uneasy. I knew what memory I would have to reveal soon. It was one I didn't like to remember. I especially didn't want Riku to see. But I especially didn't want to do this part alone. Before, it was somewhat bareable to remember, because it was only in my mind. But here I was actually reliving my memories. I didn't know if I could stand watching it again. Even in my heart, I felt myself tremble uncontrollably. I tried to calm down, but it was no use. My thoughts were starting to go out of control. I needed a way to take my mind off it. I could search my memories again without Riku; a sweet memory to prepare myself. I thought back to only a week or two ago, when that hooded man took me to see my friends.

In an instant I was back on the roof. The sun was just setting, and I saw myself at the edge, looking wildly about and finally seeing my two friends there. I remembered the fear I felt at that moment, like none other I had felt before. To think of what they would do, or what they would say.

"Hana?"

My heart stopped again, like it had before.

"We don't blame you." I heard her say. I couldn't believe what I was hearing at the time. But that was the biggest relief I ever felt in my life.

I felt myself start to cry as I watched them embrace me. What a silly thing, to not have a body but still be able to cry. It was a long time that I sat there absorbed in the memory. It must have been hours when I snapped out of it. I stood looking on them. I had frozen the memory in that place. Never in my life had I felt such mercy, and it was almost painful to see again. I thought it better to reflect on another memory.

I sent myself way back, to the dance studio I studied at when I stayed with my dad. I watched the girls twirling, striding, and tiptoeing around the room. There was me with a black leotard, pink skirt, and pink shoes; my hair now long enough to put up in a sleek bun. I looked so petite and girly, you would have never thought I was the girl with the dirty overalls and black eye.

Every worry seemed to disappear when I danced; I wanted to feel that again. I stood on my toes, and started dancing with the class. As I did, I kept my mind calm, but not like before. When I danced I could feel the earth move, and time passsed me by. And so I would listen to the silence without a single thought. I gradually lost myself in dancing, forgetting the world and everyone and everything.

I suddenly found myself in the dark again. I must not have been concentrating on my memory. I searched my memories for something new to revisit. My mind turned to an evening that all of us were walking to the restaurant after a movie. Jake fell asleep so I carried him on my back. It was the one night that we walked home and never spoke to each other. It wasn't very important for them probably, but to me it was a new level in our relationship together. Because thinking back, I realised with all the time we spent together, we should have eventually grown tired of our friendship and went different ways. But we never did; in fact our friendship grew stronger to a point where we didn't need to entertain it any longer. We were simply happy together. I followed them down the sidewalk.

"Hana."

Riku's voice broke the silence, and I jumped.

"Geez, can't you warn me when you're coming? Knock on the door or something."

"I will next time." He said, running up beside me. "Do you want me to stay?"

"Yeah."

"What are you doing?"

"Oh, just looking through some old memories, nothing important."

"Okay, well let's start."

Buying time before the next memory, I took Riku to some specifics of my childhood with my friends and brother. Back at the restaurant roof, we listened to them talking about their adult selves.

"So what are you going to do when you grow up?" I asked Marli. "You can't read books for a living."

"I bet I could!" She refuted. "But that isn't all I want to do. I want to be a medical scientist."

"Wah?" Gio and me uttered, confused.

"But that sounds boring." I said.

"It isn't so bad because you get to work in a lab with chemicals and things. Mom says if she could, she would have been one. She thinks she might've been able to find a cure for dad. She only dreams it, but maybe I could do it instead."

"Oh…" I said.

"What about you, Gio?" She asked.

"He's going to make sandwiches."

"Nu-uh!" He yelled.

"It's up to you to keep this restaurant going so we have a place to hang out. What would you do if Uncle Anthony was sick?"

"I would probably help out, of course. But who says I want to work here all my life? I'm tired of this place. So I'm going to be an actor."

We giggled.

"What's so funny? Acting is awesome! I'll be famous. Not to mention I will travel the world, filming for movies and being with my fans. Lady fans I might add."

"You want to leave?" I asked.

"Well sure. I mean we can't stay here forever."

"Jake, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

Jake had been spacing out, and hearing his name he snapped out of it.

"Umm, I want to be an astrounat."

"Ha, only kids ever say that." Gio mocked.

"But I do really want to be one. Or, well. Anything that's awesome. Maybe I would be a kung fu fighter in one of those movies. Or maybe a football player."

"That's the most realistic one yet."

"Hmm."

"Hana, you okay?" They looked to see me fighting back tears. Gio didn't realize how hard his words were on me, because even then I didn't want to lose them. I wanted us to be together always, because away from them I was nothing. Without them I was alone.

"I don't want you guys to leave." I sniffled a bit. "Everything is perfect just the way. Can't we stay like this forever?"

Marli wrapped her arms around me.

"We're going to be together for a long time from now. But even so, we have to go our separate ways eventually. There's nothing we can do about it, its just how things work."

"But we'll never leave your heart." Gio finished.

"We'll always be together." Jake said.

"Well yeah, stupid, I'm your sister."

"Hey, Hana?" Riku interrupted.

"Huh?"

"I was just wondering, I mean, this is nice and all, but are you getting where you need to go?"

"Umm…" I knew what he meant.

"It's just," He hesitated. "I know you're dancing around something… crucial."

"The day I lost them."

"Yeah…"

"Riku, why don't you leave."

"Are you sure?"

I nodded. " I don't want to be alone. I've found out I need to rely on my friends, and I spent so much time closing myself off from people… but this is too hard. I'm afraid of how I'll react to seeing this again."

Riku stared at me sternly. Our eyes met for a long time, but he never left.

"Hana, I know what I said. But, truth is, I didn't just stay with you because I want to help. I feel terrible for how I treated you before…"

"I understand what was happening, I wasn't exactly right either."

"You were more right than I was. You tried to help me. I wish I had listened to your warning. Don't make the same mistake I did, let me stay with you. Maybe I can help?"

I seriously doubted it, but he was determined. And if he was willing to stay, then I didn't want to push him away.

"Okay."

I spent a second to brace myself, then with a deep breath I started the memory.

"At the time, there was a gang called the Hatters. They were robbing and killing people, but they did it for fun. This was assumed because they never hit big, rich places, but instead common ones. Then the fact was confirmed when a boy was saved from one of their raids. It was reported that they made his mother choose between him and his father. I don't exactly remember what happened. They usually killed all their victims, but this boy survived somehow.

"I only knew about this because my mom told us about them. She said we shouldn't walk the streets at night anymore, nor stay at Uncle Anthony's at night.

"We didn't listen, of course. So one Friday night, we were making a snack downstairs in the kitchen of the restaurant. Gio's uncle had left to get some medication. We were making cookies, actually. As we talked, we heard car doors close outside. Gio looked out the door, from there he could see out the front windows. Then he lunged back, shutting the door and locking it."

"What's the…" I started.

"Go out the back, hurry!"

"Without any questions I ran to the door that lead to the alley, and they followed. But when I opened it, there was a man at the door, with a handkerchief over his face. That's all I saw before I slammed it shut. I was lucky that he didn't force his way in, and I was able to lock the door.

"Marli and Jake started panicking. I told everyone to go to the roof. There we barred the door, and looked for an escape. There was no emergency ladder. And so, the only thing we could do was jump to another rooftop. But they had forced their way onto the rooftop before we had the chance. Gio had the chance, but I believe he hesitated because he didn't want to leave us."

My emotions were steadily overwhelming me, and now I was unable to speak. Now we only watched what happened without me explaining.

They made us kneel down in a line. A big guy walked about us, examining us.

"Come on boss, we don't have all night!" One of them behind us said.

The man took Gio by the collar and flung him away from us.

"You look like a clever boy. So, I'll tell you what…" He took out his gun and pointed it at my brother. "Bring me something valuable enough in exchange for this kid's life." Some of the others chuckled.

I immediately yelled back.

"Do it, and I swear I'll end you! Who do you think you are, something special because you got guns and you prey on kids like us? You're cowards, all of you! I'll take down each of you if you touch him!"

One of them took a rifle and hit me in the ribs.

"Spirited, aren't you? It'll be fun breaking you down."

"You have your orders, boy."

Gio was frantic, and looked at us terrified. Then he ran downstairs.

It seemed like it was a lifetime of waiting, but it was only about five minutes. Marli stated crying, and Jake did his best to keep himself strong. I stared at the man who was giving the commands. Gio came back with all the money he could find from the safe. He walked up to the man.

"Put it down here." He said pointing to the ground. Gio did as he was told. Then the man kicked the pile and sent money flying through the air.

"Do it." He told the ma pointing the gun at Jake.

"No!" I screamed, flinging myself on Jake, trying to protect him. I grabbed him as tight as I could. "I won't let you take him!"

They fought to break us apart, which wasn't easy. One was trying to separate us while the other kicked me off. After awhile they succeeded, and had me pinned to the ground. The man cocked his gun, and aimed at Jake's head.

As I fought to get up, I remembered Jake looking at me one last time. He was crying.

After the shot silence was the only thing I heard. But I knew it wasn't silent. The men were laughing, Gio and Marli were sobbing. But I heard nothing.

The man let me go, and I slowly got myself on my knees again, still staring at my brother's body. I didn't take my eyes off him. Even now the image of his dead body is forever burned into my memory. Then I felt the same gun against my head.

"Would your boy again?" He asked me.

A frightful rage built up inside me. It shook my bones and clouded my mind. It was more powerful than anything I had ever felt in my life.

I grabbed the gun…

"And that's all I really remember." At some point I fell to my knees. I was so absorbed in the memory that I didn't pay any attention to myself. I said this through tears and a cracked, sobbing voice.

"I don't know… I didn't realize… its all just a blur. But I remember hearing screams, and shots, and everything was red."

I stopped and let myself cry. It was a furious outburst that I couldn't control, and I buried my face in my hands.

Nothing happened for a while. But then I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Hana, I'm so sorry."

I peeped through my fingers to see Riku sitting beside me with sympathetic eyes. I put my hands back on my face, and rested my head on his shoulder and cried. After a few seconds I felt his other hand on my head. And he sat silently as I cried.

"Hana?"

I didn't move.

"Hana!"

I still didn't respond. But then I heard a gun shot. I shot up and looked back at the scene.

With the gun in my hand, I had shot the boss. The other men stared at me, bewildered. Then, immediately, the men who had their guns in their hands pointed them at me. The few others shuffled about to find theirs.

Like clock work, I spun about and shot the men surrounding me. I had perfect aim, and hit each right in the head. It was horrid to watch. After only ten seconds or so, all the men were dead.

I looked at the gun. Then, in a moment, I spun around and shot Gio. The me on the sidelines gasped totally by surprise.

"Hana?" Marli stared at me, terrified. I turned about and shot her too.

And then it was just me, surrounded by dead bodies. I grinned, and then I laughed. I felt myself start to cry again.

But I noticed something. My eyes. They had turned yellow.

Then in a moment, right in the middle of my laughing, my entire body changed into something like a rag doll, and I fell senseless to the ground.

And everything was silent. We waited but nothing happened. It was the end.

I got up and slowly walked to her. She was covered in blood. I looked around at the men, at my friends and my brother.

Another furious rage built up in me.

"My eyes were yellow. My eyes were yellow!" I turned to Riku who looked at me blankly and a bit worried.

"It was her! My Heartless. She did this! She did this to them! To me! And she made me think this entire time that it was I who killed them!"

I angrily fought back the tears that were coming to my eyes. I couldn't stand being here anymore. I closed my mind and returned to the darkness.


	13. Chapter 13

Not a word was spoken between us for a long time after that scene. All the while I was raging inside my mind. I never really knew what happened to make me kill them. I always thought it was only a mad fury from losing my brother, and I had thought that caused my disease. But it was her that caused the entire thing. I never thought that she had anything to do with it. I detested her even more than before. Not even that. My worst enemy was inside of me, she was able to ocntrol my body!

"It must be relieving." Riku said.

"Relieving?"

"Well yeah—"

"She took my friends from me, Riku! She used me to kill them!"

"Calm down, your missing the point—"

"The point that a monster lives inside me!"

"Yes, actually. Because you didn't kill them."

I was so angry that I didn't realize that.

"You're not a killer, Hana. Doesn't that make you happy?"

"I… I guess so. I never thought about it like that."

He was right, in a way. It didn't make me feel better though, I still felt responsible.

"The real question is," I started, changing the subject, "that I didn't remember any of that. It was all new to me. So how did I remember all that?"

"I don't know."

"Can we even trust what we just saw?"

"I'll go ask Namine. She might know."

"Okay."

I dwelled for a long time on the new memory that had brought light to my crime, replaying it over and over. I watched her, except for the times she killed my friends. It hurt to think about it.

The darkness inside me must have been something special to create her. The truth is it didn't make me feel better to know I didn't kill them, I was still responsible and my friends were still gone. I wish those men had murder all of us. It would have been so much easier. I wouldn't have felt such pain as I had.

_You aren't grateful that I saved your life?_

My heart stopped as I noticed her standing beside me. I jumped away, as if I had touched a hot stove. This was the first time I actually saw her, a gray skinned, yellow-eyed version of myself with smooth white hair. She was eerie, but also beautiful. It pained me to think of her as beautiful.

"How are you here!"

_I'm here because you have darkness in your heart. I'm not going away._

"But…you were locked up…"

_Only temporarily. That spell binded to your arm allows your will to be stronger than mine. But if you let your guard down…_

She chuckled. It made me angry to hear her so pleased. I held back my anger, knowing it would probably bring her pleasure. But I couldn't hide a scowling glance.

"Just tell me one thing. Why them? Why did you have to kill them?"

_So dramatic. That's obvious. It helped me break you. Not to mention it was fun._

"I'll kill you. I will."

_If you kill me then you kill yourself, darkness is as much a part of your heart as veins are. Then what hope will you have of bringing your beloved ones back?_

"It doesn't matter to me. I'll save them, and then I'll end you. And you will never hurt anyone again."

She laughed.

_You crack me up. You're just too much!_

"It's a promise then."

She didn't say anything, or maybe it was because I silenced her myself. I closed my mind, returning to reality, and forced her away. I stayed in silence, eager to hear from Riku, eager to be out of this situation.

"I'm back."

"How was it?"

"Namine doesn't know what happened, exactly. She said maybe the computer triggered a hidden memory. Or… it could be someone has tampored with your memories."

"Is that possible?"

"It's not likely, but she wasn't keeping a close eye on you. So, I don't know if the memory is real or not."

"I think it is."

"How do you know?"

"Just a feeling."

"Hana, are you okay?"

"Of course I am. Just get me out of this… thing soon."

"Namine gave me news about that too. You are 60% synced with your body, so you're almost there."

"Okay, so let's keep going?"

"So you want me to stay again?"

"Well, only if you want to."

"Yeah, I want you to stay. Alright."

I took Riku to the hospital I was taken too after the killings. I was sleeping on a bed, with wires and tubes poked into me. Uncle Anthony was sitting on a chair next to my bed. Police stood guard outside.

Riku and I leaned against the window to the opposite side of the bed. I looked over at Riku next to me, who was looking solemnly on the scene. I couldn't help but smile; it meant a lot to me that he wanted to stay even after all that had happened. I was glad to see him so changed since last time we talked. Then, I didn't think there was any hope for him. He noticed I was staring.

"What? Is their something on my face?"

I shook my head. "It's nothing. Back to the story, this is four days after what happened. I was asleep the whole time. I don't know if my mom came to visit me, she probably did. They had already assumed it was me who killed them, but they needed my confession before anything was certain. And so, this is the day I woke up."

Watching the Hana on the bed, her eyes began to lift open. She closed them again tightly, and then opened the a bit wider. Anthony realized I was waking up and moved closer. As she looked about, Uncle Anthony caught her eye and she looked at him. His face wasn't ugly, but to me at that moment it seemed terribly so from the expression. Worry and fear and sadness all bunched into one look.

"What's the matter?" She asked slowly.

He didn't answer, I don't think he could find the words. I lowly sat up, there was a sharp pang in my shoulder. Someone else had actually shot me during the onslaught that night. I put my hand on it, and the blurry memory of that night came flooding back to me. My face turned as sour as his as I sat, silently reflecting. Then I turned again to Anthony. I never saw him cry, but then I saw big tears swell up into his eyes.

"No…" My voice cracked under sobs. "It was only a nightmare. It's not true. Where…" Now tears were rolling down my cheeks. "Where are they?"

Uncle Anthony was cryong too, suppresing loud sobs. I looked up and saw that the officers had come inside.

"No! It's not true!" I yelled. "It's not true. Marli! Gio! Jake!"

"Ma'am, please calm down."

I motioned for Riku to step back into the corner with me. "Sorry, I'm about to lose it again."

I tore the things off of my arms and fingers. The men ran to stop me. I was a bit wobbly but managed to make it to the wall and to jump onto the ledge. The men halted instinctively.

"Hana!" Uncle Anthony cried.

I looked back. "I won't live in a world where they don't exist."

"Ma'am, it's a five story drop, you won't survive."

"I'm going to have to ask for their forgiveness."

And with that as my confession, I lunged back.

The men ran down, I believe Uncle Anthony too. And we were left alone. I moved to the window, and slowly peeked down. Down on the grass, I layed on my back with my limbs sprawled out. Someone screamed. Now Riku came and looked down too.

"I can't believe that you survived that."

"Thanks to my Heartless. I was bruised badly, and broke some things in my back and hip. After a few months I was fine. During then the police and a detective came to ask me questions. I told them everything that happened and that I did kill them all except for Jake, but that I didn't rememeber how. I went to court once I was able. The lawyer wanted to fight for a shorter sentence, but it didn't matter to me. I told him to forget it. The judge sent me to 'rehab' It was actually a hospital for crazy killers. The reason they didn't send me to prison is because I was suicidal and that I had a multiple personality disorder, but I didn't believe that."

"Really?"

"I thought they had just made it up to help my case, that my other personality was actually the one who killed them. They weren't so far from the truth actually."

"Were you alone the whole time?"

"A lot of the time I was. Anthony tried to visit but I didn't like him coming to see me." I smiled. "I wonder why. I mean, I killed his nephew. He should have hated me."

"From how it seems, you guys were like his family too. He probably forgave you."

"He was an idiot."

But I was lucky to have known him. He was kind to me. I wonder if I'll ever see him again. Then a thought came across and I smiled.

"What is it?" Riku asked.

"When I bring them back to life, maybe we can all go back to him, together. I can't imagine how he is suffering. He must be lonely. Anyway, let's get going, we're almost up to present."

"Wait a minute, can I tell you something?"

"Well, yeah."

"Namine told me something else about you, something you won't like."

He paused.

"So, tell me." I started to feel worried by how hesitant he was. He didn't make eye contact, but stared down at the ground.

"Your Heartless isn't connected with your body, so it can't keep you alive. And in the state your body is in…"

"I haven't eaten or drank in a year, or more."

"Your body is rapidly shutting down, and we need to return you to your body soon."

"How much time do I have?"

"Well, today…"

"Oh… so I'm—"

"Don't worry. I won't let anything happen to you." His tone surprised me. I looked up to see him looking hard at me. "No matter what. You've come to far for that to happen."

"You idiot, there probably wouldn't be anything you could do."

He looked aggrivated.

"Riku, won't you stab my heart with the Keyblade?"

"This again! I told you no!"

"You said you'd reconsider! Besides think about it, I'm done for. And they could have their lives back! Wouldn't you have done the same for Kairi?"

He looked away. "That's not fair."

"See. You would. We could save them."

We brooded silently.

"Come on," Riku said, dryly, "let's finish this. Whatever happens happens. I guess." I let it go and did as he said.

I took Riku to the asylum. I didn't show him much, not that I wanted to see much of it myself. It was a cold, hopeless place. I told him I spent most of my time in a room of solitude as punishment for my escapes.

"I never understood myself why I wanted to escape so badly." I explained. "I think now it was my Heartless who wanted the freedom."

I showed him Karmen, and finally how we escpaed together. I showed him everyhting up to the crash. We watched as I left her in the wreckage, and I felt guilty now for not helping her.

"I knew I couldn't take her with me like that, I couldn't drag her with me. But now… I really regret it."

"I understand."

We followed her throught the forest and to the door.

"It must be the door to your world." He said when first looking upon it.

"I guess so. It's weird how it popped up here of all places."

Then we watched as the hooded man went to her and used her knife to stab her in the ribs.

"And… that's it. Next thing I know I'm washed up on your beach."

"Hmm, that was strange. Why did that man attack you?"

"I've met him. He told me he was protecting me. That stabbing me and leaving me there was the only way to send me here. He gave me this tattoo thing to keep my Heartless locked up inside me." I said showing him my arm.

"He's protecting you?"

"Yeah, weird huh?"

"From what?"

"I figured from my Heartless."

"Could be…"

"So now what? I mean that was the highlights of my past."

"I guess you're not finished yet, otherwise you would have returned to your body. I'll ask Namine how much progress you've made. Wait for me to get back."

"Like I have a choice."

As I sat in the silence, I started to feel an eerie presence with me, like someone was watching me.

_This is taking forever! I'm bored._

I didn't say or think anything, but focused on pushing her back.

_Don't be like that, what's it going to hurt to talk for a bit? You're tired of waiting too._

"I'm not going to play your mind games."

_You got me all wrong…_

"Oh, I'm sure I do. Let me guess, you aren't the souless killer that I thought you were?"

_Not like that. I just want to chat. No tricks._

"Why? Don't you know everything about me?"

_Only what your heart allows me to see. There are things I want to know._

"Like what?"

_What do you plan to do next?_

"Haven't I made that obvious?"

_Besides the obvious. Where are you going to start?_

Honestly, I had thought about it before. There were a million possibilities of where I could be, but it didn't matter. It would be easier to kill myself with a Keyblade, assuming that my theory was right and that I could trust the hooded man.

"Convince Riku to kill me with the Keyblade."

_Brilliant! Suicide! Where ever did you get that idea?_

"Shut up. I might not make it to tomorrow anyways."

_I won't let that happen._

"Why not? Wouldn't you be free?"

_In a way, but I'd only be another mindless Heartless. I need your body to keep my form._

"And you had it for a year. Why did you wait so long to take it?"

_I was making your body stronger. Ah, it was a fine work. Twisting your emotions, bending your fears to my advantage. The darkness began to stir in you with more fury. Then it grew larger and larger, and I fed off of it. But you've proved to be stronger than I imagined._

"I guess I'll take some little pride in foiling your dreams."

_You think you have, have you? Ha! Let me tell you, the darkness is still buried in your heart. Just as strong as it was before. And I will use it to defeat you._

I refused to listen anymore. I concentrated again on shutting her out. After only seconds, I immediately knew she was gone, and I was relieved. Until I heard footsteps.

"Riku?"

There was no answer, but the footsteps seemed to come closer. Fear lunged into my heart. I was unable to protect myself.

"Who's there? Tell me!"

In an instant. I was rapidly flown away into a memory. I opened my eyes onto the familiar scene of me, my friends, and my brother sitting on the roof drinking sodas. I was drying my eyes. Marli wanted to get my mind on other things to cheer me up.

"Well Hana, what do you want to be?"

I tried to act like nothing had happen, with a few sniffles I perked up.

"A world famous rocker, duh. What else would I do?"

"Proffesional kickboxing." Gio slyly commented.

"That's not funny!"

"You could beat the tar out of those guys." Marli suggested.

I looked up at the sky. "Yeah, I could."

The scene melted away and I was thrown into another memory. I found myself standing in my room, packing to go to dad's. There was a knock on the door and Jake poked his head in.

"You finished already?" I asked.

Jake didn't say anything but walked in and sat on my bed, tweedling his thumbs.

"What's the matter with you? Aren't you excited to see dad?"

"Yeah."

"Then what's wrong?" I asked, closing my suitcase and sitting beside him.

"I was thinking about what you said the other night."

Big tears swelled up in his eyes, he buried them in his hands before they streaked down his face.

"I don't want to lose you guys either! When I'm with you guys, I feel special. But when I'm not, I feel so lonely, like I'm nothing!"

"Jake, you aren't nothing. And you're never alone. You know why?"

He looked up and shook his head.

"I'm right here." I poked his chest where his heart was. "So are Gio and Marli."

"You're just copying Gio."

"Well he was right. Anyway, since we're all going to be rich and famous, we'll manage something."

"You're just saying that."

"I promise."

"Cross your heart?"

I crossed it. "I'm going to do my best to keep us together. We're family, and family always sticks together."

He sniffled and smiled.

"Now get out of my room and finish packing, we're leaving soon."

As he left, the room faded out, and I returned to the room.

"Did you remember any of that?"

I recognized the voice. It was the hooded man's.

"Vaguely."

"I realized you had lost those memories a long time ago. It was necessary for you to remember them so that you can return to your body."

"So you were the one revealing them to me?"

"Yes, I was."

"But how? How do you know my memories?"

"They are not yours. They are mine."

He was there the whole time? And he knew memories from my home, with my friends? How could I trust him now that I knew he was stalking me?

"You've been stalking me?"

"Not like that. I've been watching you. Didn't I tell you I was your protector?"

"Yeah, but…for how long?"

"Since the day you were born."

"That's… that's perverted!"

I heard him sigh. "Maybe if I show you, you'll understand."

I found myself in a hospital hallway. In front of me were two hooded people, one a woman in a crimson robe and the other a kid in a black one. They were walking down the hallway and I followed. The woman stopped and pointed to a spot through a window.

"Look, there. That child on the third road."

I stood next to her and looked down at the rows of newborn babies.

"Hana?" The boy specified.

"Yes." She replied "She is now under your care. You must not let any harm come to her. She will be the one thing you strive for in your life."

"But why her?"

"I will show you someday. But for now, know that she is a critical part for the future."

"But who is she?"

"Hope."

I looked up at the woman. Under her hood, I saw she had strange yellow-gold eyes and light brown skin. Her dark hair was dreaded and had trinkets and beads in them. I could make out a tattoo on her right eye; it was in some sort of circle. Before I noticed anything else, it all disappeared.

"Who was that woman?" I asked.

"She is one of the few people who knows the truth."

"And that's why you trust her?"

"I trust her because she saved my life, and then gave me a reason to live."

"For me? And I'm supposed to be hope? Do you even know how ironic that is?"

"I know that you are."

"And all these years you've obeyed her, without questioning her?"

"There were times I did doubt. At those times she showed me bits and pieces of the truth, and now I do not doubt her."

"But how does she—"

"Hana, in a few hours your body will die. You must take it back now or everything is over."

"Then how?"

"You must bring her back to your heart."

"Who?"

"Your Heartless."

"What?"

"I know you don't like to hear it but she is a part of you. I sewed a spell on you that gives you control of her, but now you've used it to hide her away. You must reunite her to your heart, and that will link your heart and body back together."

"I can't."

"Yes, you can. You're the one in control. You know what to do."

"It's no use, just find a way to bring Marli and Gio back."

"Stabbing your heart with the Keyblade won't bring them back."

"How do you know?"

"Because, whether you like it or not, your heart is incredibly weak, and it won't protect their hearts like Sora's did."

"I can handle it now that I'm better."

"It has nothing to do with recent events, your heart was always weak. Remember crying over the thought of losing your friends? Remember how you let insults get the better of you, and fists were the answer? Remember how suicide was your only way out? You've always been weak."

He emphasized the last part. My heart jumped in my mouth, I hated what he told me. But I slowly realized what he said was true. They made me feel helpless.

"No…I'm not—"

"Prove it."

As much as his words burned me, I wanted to prove him wrong. And there was truth. I was realizing that maybe I still needed to change. I still needed to heal. I didn't really know what I was doing, but I tried anyway. I searched my heart for whatever place that I hid my Heartless away. I called out to her, and I found it funny that I knew her name.

"Xena? Are you here?"

It was also funny calling out inside my own heart. But I felt like I was getting nowhere searching, and I wanted to give up.

"Where are you?" I yelled out.

_Hana?_

My name echoed into the distance. And as the echo disappeared, so did my grip on myself. I felt like I was slowly falling away, slowly until I was asleep.

The first thing I noticed was someone calling out to me. It was like someone yelling from the other side of a canyon. The voice came closer and closer, until it was near me. Then I could see the light slowly came through my vision, but dimly so. As it did I grew aware of a great pain in my abdomen. I clenched my stomach with my hand, looking down. I was relieved to see me body again. I looked around and saw that I was inside a sort of capsule, shaped like an egg.

"Can't you do something to get her out of there?"

It was Riku.

I stepped forward, but it sent a shock of pain to my stomach. I gasped from how badly it hurt, and used my other hand to steady myself on the wall of the egg. Then the front began to open, and the bright light burned my eyes. I looked down with my eyes shut. My mind went numb, and, though I thought I kept myself standing, I fell forward, out of the egg. I hardly felt a thing, like I was weightless. When I was able I opened my eyes again, and saw Riku over me, propping me up. He was saying something to me, but all I heard was silence. I also noticed a blonde girl with blue eyes, and then everything faded away.


	14. Chapter 14

I woke up lying on a bed under some covers. I slowly raised myself up on an elbow, when that same pain in my stomach came back. I groaned and almost dropped back down if it wasn't for how dry my mouth was. I managed to sit up on the bed. I noticed I was wearing someone's pajamas.

I found myself in a crumy apartment, filled with old pizza and Chinese take out boxes. I noticed a set of drums in one corner. I saw that I was laying on a pull out bed from a sofa. I found Indi at my side, and patted him on the head. In front of me there were two doors, and to the left was another door. I looked to the right and saw a bar, which I assumed had a kitchen behind it. I staggered to my feet. It surprised me how off-balanced I was, I couldn't even raise my body up. With one arm pressed against my stomach I quickly shuffled to the bar and helped myself all the way up.

The kitchen was worse than the living room. The sink was full of dirty glasses and utensils. Old food sat on the counter. Everything seemed dirty. I was afraid to open the fridge. I opened and closed cabinets (that were mostly empty) searching for a glass. Then I heard a cough behind me. I whirled about to see a mess of red curly hair.

At least, that was the first thing I noticed. I was staring up at a tall guy with hair down to his shoulders. It was so curly and thick that I could imagine birds hiding in it like in the cartoons. He let it droop over his face so I couldn't see it well, except for one relaxed green eye staring down at me. I could hardly speak. I felt like an intruder, and caught in the act. Then I noticed him holding a cup. I could see brown spots on it. He went to the sink, filled it with water, and offered it to me. I hesitated.

"It's the best cup you'll find here."

I turned to the bar, where a girl was sitting. She had sharp hazel eyes and long green hair, with a sly grin on her face. Unlike the man who was in his pajamas, she was already in her normal clothes.

"You might want to go back to sleep," she remarked, "you need to work on the beauty part."

I turned back to the man who still held out the drink.

"Thank you." I said, slightly shocked at how sickly my voice was.

I took the drink, finding one arm was to weak to even hold the cup, and braced it with the other hand. I raised it to my lips, but then slowly put it down. I realized that this would be my first drink in over a year, and it was tap water in a dirty glass. I wondered if I even knew how to drink antmore. But I was dying of thirst, and it was impossible to delay it any longer.

I took a sip. It was possibly the most refreshing thing I had tasted in all my life. I eagerly gulped the rest. As I put my head back to finish it off, I lost my balance and nearly fell back if it wasn't for the fridge behind me. The man took my arm instantly.

"Woah, why don't you go sit back down before you break something." The girl said.

I didn't like him helping me and I didn't like the way she talked to me. I would have said something but I suddenly felt exhausted. I let him walk me back to the bed and sat upright on the edge. The girl whirled around in her stool to face me, and the man sat on the side table beside me.

"Where am I?" I asked.

"Twilight Town, in the downtown area. You've been sleeping here for a few days."

"How did I get here?"

"I don't know. We were hoping you would fill us in on that part. We found you passed out leaning against the front door with that little guy in a backpack and a guitar."

Then it all came back to me everything that had happened with Riku, Namine, and the hooded man. I felt relieved just to know I was alive.

"Hello? You there?"

"Oh, yeah. No, I don't remember where I came from."

It was easier to keep them in the dark rather than accounting my entire story for them. I didn't have the energy anyway.

"Great. So that makes you another mouth to feed, huh?"

I looked down and twirled my thumbs. I hadn't noticed the man cut a sharp glance to the girl.

"What? She can't work or do much of anything. And we aren't rolling in cash."

After I figured out she wasn't talking to me, I looked back to the man who was still glaring at her.

"You remember your name?"

"Are you talking to me?"

"Of course I'm talking to you."

She was definitely not the type I liked.

"Hana. And that's Indi."

"Oh, praise the king you remember its name." She wheeled out of her chair and went to the kitchen sink. She turned the faucet on and made a lot of noise in the sink. Then I felt a hand on my head. The man had gotten to his feet and I guessed was patting my head for reassurance. He walked over close to the girl and started some weird hand signs and whistle gestures to her. I got up on my knees to watch over the bar. The girl barely glanced over as he did this.

"I know she is, but I didn't think we had to—"

He interrupted.

"I'm not cross."

He whistled some more.

She stomped out of the kitchen and to the foot of my bed.

"I'm sorry. I'm Vib, and he's Cor." She scowled at him for a half second then turned back to me and courtsied. "Welcome to our home." And abruptly started back at her work. Cor continued glaring at her, then turned to me and smiled, and walked to another room.

I sat there brooding while Indi sat beside me. None of this was my fault; I had no idea how I got here. Riku must have taken me here. But why? Why not keep me in whatever place he was? Maybe he was too busy, and I'm too weak to take care of myself evidently.

Vib made a big crash in the sink, which drew my attention. She was angry and she made me angry. I thought up a few things to say to her, but as I drew a breath I stopped to reconsider. I remembered what the hooded man told me, that my heart was weak. I've always been a strong person; I never even considered that it was a front to cover up how weak I really was. I wouldn't have admitted it myself if it wasn't for my sorry life for the past year. I wasn't anything without them. I would have to make myself stronger, not only for them but for me too.

I held my temper, and slowly lifted myself onto the stool at the bar where she had been sitting. I sat there for a few minutes, with my jaw resting on my hand.

"Sorry…if I'm a burden."

I felt like a twit.

"Don't worry." She said, not looking over. "We won't turn you out on the street or anything."

There was an awkward silence. I felt entirely out of my element, not to mention she didn't like me much. She was the first to break the silence.

"You still thirsty?"

"Yeah."

"Here." She said as she filled another glass with water. "I cleaned it. I guess you're hungry too."

I nodded to her as she gave me the glass. As I gulped it down she opened the fridge and took out a box.

"All we have is cold pizza. Unless you want moldy pizza."

I sighed as I finished off the glass. "That's fine." I noticed the tone in her voice started to sound nicer. Or at least not angry.

She sat a piece on a plate in front of me and took the glass to refill it.

"You should slow down or you're going to make yourself sick."

I didn't listen. I picked up the pizza and slowly raised it to my mouth. Eating had never been this tedious before, but I had to take it slow incase I forgot how to eat. I cringed at the bite. It was too salty, and really cheap. But I wasn't going to say anything. It was delightful being able to eat and drink again. I quickly finished it and slowly drank my water while Vib kept on washing.

"I'm not really sure why I was so mad. I'm not usually like that."

"You shouldn't apologize, it's not easy taking in some half dead person out of the blue."

"It's not so bad. At least you're polite."

I chuckled. "Not many people would say that I am. Can I have some more pizza?"

She rolled her eyes and took my cup and plate. "You better not throw all this up later. How long has it been since you last ate?"

"Awhile."

She gave me another slice of pizza and a cup of water. I ate slowly this time.

"So Cor," I asked, "he doesn't talk much?"

"Nah, never has since I've known him. He hardly says anything. We worked together and I had to learn his language, not that anyone else would. He told me he took a vow of silence when he was a kid. He believes the world would be a better place if people stopped saying stupid or mean things to one another, so he decided he would take the first step to proving it. But I've never thought him to say things like that. I guess he's setting an example, but he wouldn't do it if he didn't like it."

"So it's only you two here?"

"Yeah, oh! Not like that though. He's like my big brother, and he calls me his little sister." She smiled. "We don't have family so we stick together."

I smiled too.

"Do you have family?"

"I did. But I've lost them now."

"Ha! So you do remember!"

I was confused for a moment, but then I remembered I had told them that I didn't know anything.

"Well I remember a few things."

"Hmm. Fine, keep it that way if you want. But do keep in mind you need to find a job when you are able. You won't be freeloading."

"Understood."

Cor opened the door dressed, with a bicycle wheel in his hand and a backpack over his shoulder. He whistled something to Vib.

"Is it already that time?" She ran through the door and came back out with her backpack. "We got to go! Stay here and don't steal our stuff or let anyone in!" She ran out the door and Cor saluted to me as he left. Then I was left by myself.

I felt a bit lost left by myself in the apartment. I quickly finished the rest of my meal, and took the dishes to the sink. I noticed a window over the sink. I lifted the screen, and the sun blinded me for an instant. I looked out at the multiple buildings in front of me. It looked like a big city. It seemed dark in the streets, even thought it was the middle of the day. I wondered how big of a town it was. I wanted to go out and see, but I couldn't help feeling exhausted again. I strode to my bed and sat on it. Indi eagerly greeted me. I suddenly felt angry at Riku for dumping me here. No explanation. No message. After everything that had happened and he just left me outside someone's apartment? It wasn't fair.

I layed back down on the sofa-bed and pulled the covers over my head, trying to forget about the mess. Both of them. Instead I indulged myself in sweet memories, and fell asleep again.

I woke up to Vib and Cor talking, both in Cor's language. I glanced up briefly and then shut my eyes again so that they didn't know I was awake. I listened to them but there was no way of understanding what they were saying. I couldn't help but notice how impossible it was to communicate with it. I couldn't make heads or tails of it.

I must have slept through the entire day. I forgot how nice it was, cuddled in warm blankets, being able to shut myself off. I wouldn't have gone half as insane as I did if I could have slept.

Suddenly, like I was hit with a bat, My stomach cramps returned. I balled up to try to make the pain go away, and slightly groaned which caught the others attention.

"Hana, are you okay?" Vib asked as she came to examine me.

I grunted 'no' as I buried my face in the pillow.

"I knew it. You ate too much too fast. Did you eat anything else after we left?"

I shook my head.

She sighed, then she spoke with Cor in the language I didn't understand. After a few minutes they stopped and I heard the door open and shut.

"He's going to get something for you to make you feel better, alright."

"Alright." I grumbled slightly turning my head.

"You better not throw up."

I had almost fallen back to sleep before Cor came back. He nudged my shoulder, and I groaned. He made me sit up, and took a bottle from a plastic bag. He opened it and gave it to me.

"What is this?" I asked.

"Elixir. It's legal."

I took a swig. It tasted like sour milk, but not so unpleasent. I finished half of it and the pain subsided. I gave the bottle back and laid down to sleep again.

"You passed out last night after almost throwing up." I heard as I sat up in bed. "Kind of like you partied too hard or something."

"It wasn't nearly as much fun." I grumbled as I stood up. My head was dizzy but at least I felt normal. I looked to the kitchen to see Vib finishing a drink.

"I bought milk and bread, help yourself. I got to go to work," she said as she walked by, "try not to sleep all day today." And with that she was gone.

I walked to the fridge and grabbed the milk. It took me sometime to find a clean glass. I had to rinse it out. I poured a glass and chugged it. I liked milk a lot more than water. I looked around and found a sweet loaf on the counter. As I grabbed a slice, Indi came up on the counter to join me. I ate the slice in small bites and finished another glass of milk. I couldn't finish but half of the slice, so I gave the rest to Indi. He ate the top part.

As I stood there with my meal, I realised something. I was incredibly bored, and there wasn't much to do here. As I peered around, all that I noticed was all the junk piling up everywhere. Old clothes, half empty to-go boxes, and empty drink cans cluttered the corners, the tables, the sink, and any other neglected area. I wondered why it didn't smell. I walked over to examine the drum set sitting in the corner that I noticed earlier. There was junk pilled on top of it too. Next to it was a desk with an old computer. I found the sticks sitting there. Inbetween the drums and desk was my guitar. I took it out and laid it on my bed. It was pretty cool that one of them played drums, maybe they even had a band. I wondered if they would play music with me, I'd never really played with anyone before.

Now I wanted to know what happened to my other things. If I found my clothes I could take a look outside. I hadn't seen them anywhere in the room, so I figured they must be in another room. I glanced over at the counter and saw Indi trying to open the package for more bread.

"Indi!" I hissed, which caught his attention. Then I figured maybe he knew where my things were. "Do you know where my clothes are?"

He cocked his head sideways.

"My clothes." I repeated as I tugged my shirt.

He stood up and jumped down to the ground, then scurried to the door that I assumed was their bedroom. I didn't like the thought of them thinking I was searching their belongings. I would just have to explain later. I stepped into a small bedroom, with beds on either sides. There was just enough room for a walkway and bedside table inbetween them, and at the foot of their beds were chests full of their things. It was just as cluttered as the other room. I thought to myself it was kind of like my room at the mental institute, just more stuff. I shuttered at the thought.

On the chest to my right I saw my backpack, and inside were all my clothes. I took them back to the living room and changed. I felt more at ease in my clothes; they were one of the few things still familiar to me. I decided it was too risky to go out in the streets: not knowing my way around and being in a weakend state. Instead, I wanted to go to the roof, to watch the city from there.

I turned the knob and opened the door. How bizare it was stepping out into a place I had never seen the outside of. As I stepped out, I felt Indi tugging at my pants. I could tell he was worrying.

"Come on. We aren't staying cooped up in there." I said, pulling him up with my leg, and stepping out into the hallway. It was a cheap place, that was certain. The old wallpaper was cracking and torn in places, the carpet was stained everywhere. Like in the apartment, I was scared to look too close that I might find a cockroach. At the end of the hallway was a red exit sign, so I made my way there. I shoved through a metal door into a stairway.

Already I was exhausted. I wasn't so worried, but I knew I needed to take it slow. I started up the flight, and immediately felt my body weighing down on me. My heart rate speedily picked up and my head grew dizzy. Finally, I made it to the next floor gripping the handlebar and breathing heavily. I forced myself to the corner wall and leaned against it to catch my breath.

There I debated the thought of going back. After all it would be bad if I passed out here, and I didn't know how many more flights I'd have to climb before I got to the top. But I had already come all this way. I couldn't give up.

So I pressed on after a minute's rest. This time I took more care to rely on the handlebar. I again grew worse, to the point that I had to stop halfway there to rest. Eventually I made it, and I leaned against the wall for rest. But I knew there was no way I could make it up another one. Not yet anyway, Maybe if I rested for five or ten minutes, I would be able to get the rest of the way. So I stayed there for awhile, leaning against the wall, doing my best not to sit down (I thought if I did I wouldn't get up again). That is until someone came through the door.

"Ay, what's up with you, girl?"

I looked over to a man in his thirties, with a burly black beard and black hair sleeked back into a ponytail. He had baggy, hobo clothes and a messenger bag.

"Nothing."

"You look down right sickly. You needing help?"

"Can you tell me what floor it is?"

"This floor here is the fifth floor."

"Are there any more floors above us?"

"This is the highest floor. Above us is nothing but the roof."

"Right, that's all I needed to know. Thanks."

"What are you panting for? You're not one of those jocks that exercise by running up and down stairs, are ya?"

"Heh, no I'm not."

"You want some of this?" He pulled out a water bottle from his bag and offered it to me.

"You sure?"

"Sure I'm sure."

I took the bottle and took a big gulp before immediately spitting it back out. It wasn't water, but some foul alcohol. The man started cracking up.

"Drink up, little lass! It's good stuff. Made it myself."

"You make moonshine?"

"It's my livelyhood. Keeps better alcohol on the table." He added with another chuckle. I gave him back the bottle and he went on his way.

Once he was gone, I was ready to make the last leg. It wasn't any easier, not to mention that I stumbled a few times, but I was more motivated now that I knew my destination was close. I finally made it, and opened the door outside.

It was cloudy, which probably had to do with how dark it seemed. In front of me I saw the rows of tall buildings I saw earlier. Now I could see the neon signs that decorated them. What light that was lacking was made up for in neon signs. There were several, and they were brighter than the sky. I walked to the edge, and surveyed it all, but everything looked about the same. The only difference I noticed was what seemed like a large space among the buildings, probably where a plaza was, or maybe the downtown.

I sat down on the ledge, and Indi curled up beside me. I stared out at the buildings, trying to plan my future, wondering how I could bring my friends' hearts back without using the Keyblade. I understood now that I had to find another way, but where could I begin? In a library? Where could I find a book about people's hearts? It was impossible to know now. I didn't need to think it through until I was in a better condition. And with luck, the hooded man or someone else would come to help me.

My thoughts turned to Riku. Regardless of how kind he was to me, I now only felt angry toward him. The nerve he had to leave me here. Without any message, or sign, or anything to let me know what was going on. He should have left me with an explanation for all this. Instead he just dumped me off somewhere. Kind of like dumping dogs on streets or at people's houses. I didn't like thinking of it in that way.

So I let myself reminisce of my past, of my time with my friends and my brother, even up to Sora and the friends I made here. Or at least, I thought of them as my friends. Thinking about it, I'm sure they don't think that way of me. And with good reason too. Still, there were happy memories of there. And so I stayed thinking like that as I stared into the city, and eventually let myself drift off into a dreamy state.

Half asleep, I heard a whistle. I didn't understand what it was at first, but mixed the sound in with my dream. But as it occurred a few more times, I slowly realised that it wasn't a part of my dream. I opened my eyes to see the city, turned on it's side. Or it was me lying down. I heard the whistle again, and turned my head to see a red mop of hair and a pair of green eyes staring down at me.

I yawned and hauled myself up.

"So, you found me."

Cor came to sit next to me. I still felt half asleep.

"I was going to go back before you two came back."

I heard scribbling. I looked over at Cor with a paper and pen. He showed me his paper, which read:

**That is dangerous.**

"What is? Sleeping on the ledge?"

He nodded.

I yawned again.

"Sorry, I didn't know I fell asleep."

We sat for a moment watching the sky. The sun was setting, and the sky was lit with red, orange, and purple somewhere above the clouds. The buildings in front were completely black.

"Are you in a band?" I said glancing over at Cor.

He looked at me and knitted his eyebrows together.

"I saw the drums. Do you play them?"

He made an expression that seemed to say 'ahhh', and then scribbled on his paper.

**I do play drums. But I'm not in a band.**

"How come?"

He started to seem a bit uncomfortable, I noticed when he bit his lips.

**I was once. Not anymore.**

"I guess you don't want to tell me about it."

He shrugged his shoulders and then glanced back. I guessed he would have Vib explain.

I felt my head grow heavy, and I would have fallen asleep if Cor hadn't nudged me awake. I looked over at him, and I could faintly see him point the exit in the dark.

"Already?"

He stood up and I took his hand that he offered. However, as I stood, the pain came back to my stomach, and I doubled over. Cor tried to help me keep steady. I kneeled to the ground, and in a few seconds they stopped. I told him I was fine and tried to stand again, but they came back and sent me to the ground. Cor had to carry me back to the apartment, and I passed out before we reached it.


End file.
